Saturday, November 2, 2013

Kaelah's Corner (Oct 2013):
Five of the Best?

Yeah, I know I am a bit late for my monthly corner post, girls and guys. I have been very busy at work. It seems like kink is around every corner at the moment at my work place, though. And not only because I've noticed a round open space outdoors which in my opinion would be very suitable for public floggings of lazy employees. No, I am talking about colleagues using kinky phrases. I've heard the word punishment. People talk about swinging the whip in order to make others work faster. There are references to self-flagellation. And two times a caning was mentioned as well!

The funny thing is that it was exactly the same number of strokes both times, though the people involved were completely different. In the first case, someone was asked what would happen if people were to come late to a time-critical meeting. The instant reply: "That means five cane strokes." I couldn't help but imagine how much more exciting some meetings might be if that were true. A while later, a line manager talked to his employees about certain incidents which they were supposed to avoid in the future. To clarify that the matter wasn't an ultimately critical one, though, he closed his speech with the words: "Don't get me wrong, I didn't say that you'll get five cane strokes if it ever happens again."

I have to admit that I enjoy it when kinky references come up at work. Sometime I even chime in. For instance, a colleague mocked me and then joked that I would surely soon start to beat him if he didn't act more carefully. I replied that unfortunately, I didn't have anything suitable to throw at him. He handed me a heavy magnet which was lying around and told me that this would surely hurt a lot. I couldn't refrain from telling him that he was displaying some very masochistic tendencies. Which he of course denied with a laugh.

Well, I am quite sure that most of my colleagues really aren't kinky. I mean, would a real kinkster talk about FIVE cane strokes? I discussed with Ludwig why the number five had been chosen both times. His idea of the most likely explanation was that vanillas are used to the decimal system. Ten strokes might seem too much, two or three too little, and so, five is obviously a likely choice. I think Ludwig's suggestion is right. Still, five doesn't fit into my kinky cosmos of numbers. But nonetheless it's fun to hear vanillas use kinky phrases at work.

How about you? Kink and work, is that a combination which can be fun for you or does the thought of colleagues making kinky jokes cause you to break out in a cold sweat? And do you think that one can distinguish kinksters from vanillas by the number of strokes they choose when making kinky jokes? You are welcome to share your thoughts and experiences in the comment section!


Rich Person said...

I thought the standard measure was "six of the best". So, I'm completely at a loss why someone would cite "five".

I try to refrain from using such terminology in the office. However, one time I did note to my co-worker that she was going to flog someone for their poor performance. I got a hearty laugh. Perhaps she liked the idea.

Donpascual said...

I cannot remember kink in my work place, however, that is ancient history. I am retired for 11 years now.
But recently I had to stay in a hospital for a few days and two young but very professional nurses were filling in data they had collected over the day into patient's records.
One of them did not seem to remember my morning temperature and the other one said something like: If the head nurse XYZ had noticed, that I forgot to enter it into the record it would mean a well thashed behind (in German "einen Hintern voll"). Besides telling her what my morning temperature reading was, I could not refrain from commenting this remark by "there are people who would not mind that".
They both giggled and I was rewarded by two pretty red faces. To make a seasoned nurse blush
is not easy. I just wonder about the truth behind that remark.

Bob S said...

Just doesn't fly in today's workplace, at least in the US.

Fessee13 said...

I very rarely joke about sending myself to the woodshed once in a while. People generally just laugh a bit but no one's taken me up on the offer. :/

M said...

I give strokes in multiples of 5. I'm bad at counting, and if I use 5 then I can discreetly keep count on the fingers of my non-caning hand!

Fenris said...

Hopefully, this post means that you are feeling better and are able to enjoy the kink and blogging, once again. Having fun at work is certainly a big bonus.
Anything even remotely linked to the kink tends to kick-start my mind, be it at work or in private. I always wonder whether the other person might be "one of us". Obviously, directly asking them is not an option in most cases, certainly not at work, although it seems that the theory of vanillas using the decimal system might work as a useful first screening.
Once, I had a female colleague threaten me with ten strokes after teasing her a bit which seems to confirm my overall impression that she is not kinky (to my great disappointment). Even without other co-workers present, saying "Make it a dozen and we have a deal" did not seem fully appropriate.

Lea said...

I'm entertained when I hear vanilla people make kinky references. I rarely chime in though or I think I may offer too much to the discussion and feel I've given myself away!

Kaelah said...

Wow, it's been a really long time since I last answered comments! That doesn't mean I haven't read and appreciated every single comment, though. And now I've finally found the time to get back to all of you.

@ Rich Person:
Five is a totally odd number for me as well when it comes to spanking! And I guess even vanilla co-workers sometimes like the idea of flogging someone for poor performance. ;-)

@ Donpascual:
Thank you very much for sharing that funny story. It's a mess that you obviously didn't meet said head nurse in person to find out how much truth was behind the story...

@ Bob S:
Yes, I see! That's indeed a problem. I am glad that it is not so extreme in Germany, even though one has to be a bit careful as well, depending on the people around.

@ Fessee13:
I keep my fingers crossed that someone will take you up on the offer one day!

@ M:
That's a very good reason for using multiples of five! Keeping count while spanking can indeed be difficult at times, as Ludwig and I found out on different occasions as well.

@ Fenris:
I am indeed feeling a bit better and my kink seems to return slowly but steadily. Thank you very much for asking! Your story supports my theory that vanillas tend to have the decimal system in mind when counting strokes. It's a mess that your co-worker obviously was vanilla. The idea of saying "Make it a dozen and we have a deal" is great! I can understand why you didn't try it for real, though. ;-)

@ Lea:
Finding the right balance between chiming in and not saying too much when a kinky topic comes up in a vanilla environment can be really difficult!