The Bath Towel

In my last Kaelah's Corner post I wrote about my idea to make appointments for sex since Ludwig and I have so little spare time left. Today's post is about the incident which brought up the whole topic.

One evening a few weeks ago, Ludwig was in the mood for a bit of intimacy and asked me whether I was up for it, too. I was extremely tired, though, and had to tell him that the time wasn't right for me. But the next day promised to be less busy, so I suggested that this might be the chance to share some quality time together.

It wasn't really an appointment, rather an option we kept in mind. On the next evening, I was indeed much less exhausted, albeit not really in the mood for vanilla sex. Unlike a year ago I didn't let that scare me, though, and just pondered what kind of intimacy I was up for. It came to me that I would enjoy a hot bath together. After that I could cater to Ludwig's needs and maybe be rewarded with a relaxing massage in return.

Ludwig liked the idea and so we took a relaxing, hot bubble bath together. Afterwards we built us a cozy place for the next things to come. Ludwig came over, wearing only a towel around his hips. Which I grabbed and pulled off him. The towel had inspired me to what I would love to do as well.

So I told Ludwig to lay down, stood above his sexy slim body and used the towel on his naked buttocks. Since the towel was almost dry, aiming and controlling it wasn't really easy. So I couldn't hit too hard, but enjoyed myself nonetheless. I have to admit I am not sure about it anymore, but I think I added some handspanks, too.

Afterwards I made sure that Ludwig enjoyed himself, too. To Ludwig's and my own surprise my submissive side popped up during the process. Thus, instead of asking Ludwig for a massage, I started wriggling my bottom at him after I had lay down. And so the day ended with Ludwig grabbing my hair and catering to my needs as well.

Kaelah's Corner (Jan 2017): An Appointment

As our avid readers know, spare time has become less and less over the past years for Ludwig and me. This affected many aspects of our life, one of them being our sexual and kinky play. Lots of duties and only little time to recharge the batteries means that we now have less time and energy for sex and kinky fun than when we first met in 2009.

That isn't much of a problem for us, though, since we are close to each other on so many levels nowadays that having less erotic time together isn't such a huge loss. Of course, we still desire each other on a sexual level, just less frequently – after a stressful day, a nice dinner and a hot bath together can be the more tempting option!

Still, it can be challenging to find a time when we both have a few hours off, enough energy and are both in the mood for some sexual fun. Which finally brings me to today's topic: It seems to me that making explicit appointments for sex could be a way for us to fix this problem. So this is the theme I would like to discuss today.

Scheduling dates for sex is something which a couple who are friends of ours do. They are still very much in love and still have an active sexual life after many years of marriage. I don't know the details, but I think they have at least one date per week. And it seems to work out very well for them.

If you had asked me about the concept a year or so ago, I would have said that appointments for sex weren't for me, though. Because it would have set me under pressure that I must be in the right mood for sex at a time that was agreed upon previously.

That was not only a problem for me concerning vanilla sex with Ludwig, I had the same problem with kinky events and especially kinky video shoots that involved people other than Ludwig and me. After all, spanking is a very intimate thing for me, too, even if less intimate than vanilla sex. So I was always scared that I might not be in the mood for a kinky scene at the time of the event or shoot, but would have to go through with it nonetheless because the others involved counted on me. Fortunately, that never turned out to be a huge problem, but it was always on my mind.

Today, I am much more relaxed about the concept of scheduled erotic events, not only kink-wise, but also concerning vanilla sex. The reason is that I am not so much caught up in the idea anymore that I have to fulfil other people's expectations.

Concerning appointments for sex, that means those appointments would be made in order to give Ludwig and me both a good time. Nobody can guarantee in advance to be in the mood for sex at a given time. So, having made an appointment between lovers wouldn't mean that either of us would have to deliver a certain performance.

It would only mean that we would set aside time for each other and for being close. And then everything would be possible, but nothing a must. Kinky roleplay, vanilla sex, a handjob for one partner and a nice massage for the other who isn't in the mood for sexual stimulation, cuddling, taking a hot bath together and much more. It would just be a matter of communicating one's mood and one's needs openly and honestly, something which Ludwig and I are really good at.

We spontaneously had a kind of appointment for sex a few weeks ago, which brought up the whole topic I am writing about today. Ludwig was in the mood for sex one evening, but I was much too tired. After thinking for a short moment, I realised that the next day was filled with fewer activities and therefore would be a good day for some intimate time together. So this is what I told Ludwig. And while we didn't really make an appointment by setting a certain time or even agreeing that it would definitely happen, we indeed had a great erotic time together the next day. It involved a spanking, too, so I will write more about it in another post.

I am not sure that I would want to have a regular appointment for intimacy on a certain day of the week at a certain time. But taking a look at possible timeslots for an erotic time together from time to time might indeed be a good idea.

When I contemplated the topic, it came to me that appointments are indeed quite common for spanking play, especially when we are talking about kinky events, group roleplay or play partners who aren't a couple. And I guess many couples plan and schedule more elaborate scenes beforehand, too. After all, for many kinksters, the anticipation is a huge part of the fun!

I suppose that explicit appointments for vanilla sex are less common, though, especially for couples. And at first, the idea sounded much stranger to me than planning and scheduling a kinky scene in advance. Somehow, making a date for vanilla sex only seemed to be necessary for people who want to have sex with someone they are not in a relationship with. But today, I don't find the thought so strange anymore. And I think there could be advantages similar to those of scheduled kinky play, like looking forward to a time of closeness and relaxation. So maybe Ludwig and I will try this out more often in the future.

I would love to hear your thoughts on the topic! Are your kinky scenes scheduled in advance? How about vanilla sex or a mixture of kinky play and vanilla sex? Can you imagine scheduling that in advance, too, or have you actually made experiences with that already? Does it work out? Please feel free to share your thoughts in the comment section.