Thursday, April 16, 2009

Kentucky Fried Flogging

I'm back from a week of Easter holidays and pleased to see that the text I wrote titled Monks and Roses was successfully posted during my absence. You see, some readers have speculated in the past that I have an automated posting machine (see the comments section here), or that I am, in fact, a machine myself (as Rachel once remarked on Niki Flynn's blog: "It is sometimes quite difficult to tell the difference between Ludwig and a computer."). But this was the first time ever that I didn't publish a post "live", while sitting at the PC. I simply put it in the queue before my departure, and by the time it went up on Saturday morning, I was already in the Eifel mountains, looking at ancient German castles.

It was great to spend a few days totally incommunicado, without emails or internet, but with a new and very special companion. In the meantime, the "future posts" queue allowed me to keep up with my blogging schedule. Maybe it will keep people from starting silly rumours about my whereabouts! Still, now that I'm home again, there is a lot to catch up on. In the comments to Part IV of the Hostel Trilogy: Communion, the debate continued about how moral or immoral it is to thrash Hungarian vanilla girls in a super-severe CP movie. It's a question I answered for myself a long time ago, otherwise I wouldn't have wielded the cane for Mood Pictures in the first place. But while the subject is old news in one way, it was a long and fairly interesting discussion, and you might find food for thought in what I and others had to say.

With the Mood shoot, the extended multi-part report about it and a few more journeys in recent weeks, I didn't always meet my posting quota. If I had unfailingly stuck to my every-four-days routine from new year's day onwards, the 31st post of 2009 would be coming on May 1st. Now, what I'm going to do is this: because the final part of my Budapest travelogue was twice the length of an average text, at over 3,500 words, I'm going to count it as two posts. Furthermore, starting today, I will switch to a temporary every-three-days schedule, and this will take me to post number 30 of the year on May 1st. Then, the cosmic spheres of my universe will be in harmony again.

What you can expect in the coming month-and-a-half: another behind-the-scenes report, about an SM-Circus shoot I did in late March with Pandora Blake. Followed by an account of my adventures with the "special companion" I mentioned before. Third, if everything goes as planned, I'll visit another CP video producer soon and I'll write about the experience (hint: it's one of the websites I reviewed last year). And in mid-May, it's time for the BoundCon VI fetish convention here in Munich, where I'll meet old and new friends. Looks like there will be some lengthy texts to write, plus the usual movie and paysite critiques.

While I'm getting on the job, I leave you for today with a humorous little clip from the big screen. It's from
The Kentucky Fried Movie, the first collaboration by Zucker, Abrahams and Zucker (ZAZ), the team responsible for popular anarcho-slapstick classics like Airplane!, Top Secret! and The Naked Gun series. In my opinion, their earliest effort is also their best. KFM is just a collection of sketches, basically, spoofing everything from TV commercials to news programs to high school science films. It's a hit and miss affair, with some parts that are clearly better than others, but the hits are riotously funny - raunchy, irreverent and in wonderfully bad taste. The main feature, a longer segment called "A Fistful of Yen", still stands as the best Bruce Lee parody of all time.

My other favourite sketches include the trailers for the exploitation flicks of mythical producer "Samuel L. Bronkowitz" (a pun on Samuel Bronston and Joseph L. Mankiewicz). They lampoon 1970's disaster movies ("That's Armageddon!"), blaxploitation cinema ("Cleopatra Schwartz") and pornography ("Catholic High School Girls in Trouble"). The porn film spoof also includes a bit of whipping, the "crazed clown" at 1:23, which is why I'm posting it here. It's much too brief and silly, of course, to be of any erotic interest, but I thought it's fairly entertaining in its way.

As a porn trivia footnote: the big-breasted woman in the shower is Uschi Digard, a Swedish-born softcore model who was quite famous at the time. She has a whipping scene of her own in a (rightfully) forgotten 1973 sexploitation movie named Superchick.

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