Global Day of Delurk 2021

This is a little bit of a strange day for us, since this year on LOL Day, we not only say hello and thanks to our silent and not-so-silent readers, but kind of delurk on our own blog as well. I haven’t published a post since May, not even on my blogiversary in August.

But as the long-time readers among you know, this occasion is very important to Ludwig and me. LOL Day in 2008 was the first time I left a comment on this blog, which at the time was written solely by Ludwig. Actually, it was my first-ever comment on any spanking blog or any blog at all. I was a total newbie to spanking. While I’d had spanking fantasies for as long as I could remember, I didn’t know what these things I was fantasizing about were actually called and that there were many others like me. Only a short time earlier had I stumbled upon erotic spanking-related content for the first time, and a short time later upon this blog.

I remember how excited and nervous I was when I read about LOL Day and finally decided to write a comment and come out of the dark. It was wonderful to see how happy Ludwig was to hear from new readers. A short time later, I started exchanging e-mails with him. It was great to talk about “those fantasies” to someone who understood me. I started trusting Ludwig so much that I eventually asked him to meet in person and find out whether the chemistry was right for him to introduce me to the world of spanking.

Well, it was... And so, I did not only experience my first erotic spanking in a wonderful and very geeky Klingon initiation ceremony, but also found a boyfriend in Ludwig. The next years were full of new kinky and vanilla experiences. We met fellow bloggers and readers of our blog, visited spanking parties and made a few spanking videos. We wrote many blog posts, discussed ethical questions, shared our private exploits and kinky pictures.

We also wrote openly about some of our flaws and problems. For instance, about my commitment phobia. But despite the trouble that came especially with my anxieties, Ludwig and I became “Mr and Mrs Rohrstock-Palast” and parents, too. That changed our lives drastically. Today, I try to write this post on the fly with two vocal kids in the background.

Of course, now that we are parents and have many other new responsibilities as well, our lives have  been centered around other things than kink and erotic fun during the last few years. But still we kept this blog alive until May this year.

What happened then had nothing to do with our kids. Ludwig and I have another big project that had already started last year and which we had been looking forward to. But this spring many things started going wrong. Things that were partly out of our control. Suddenly we were having trouble with people we had hoped to get along with, there were new financial challenges thanks to Covid and the increasing prices, and the time schedule didn’t work out as planned, either. Ludwig and I tried to get things right. We worked even harder, we did even more than we had already done before. Part of the things we were able to handle, especially the costs and the time schedule. We know that we can be happy, because our jobs weren’t affected negatively by Corona and we didn’t lose any family members to it. But the emotional trouble and the stress with some people because of our project escalated, and all of our attempts to calm things down were to no avail.

It got so bad that I started having panic attacks again. Ludwig was very close to a burnout, too. That was when I stopped writing on this blog, because I didn’t even have enough energy left for a singe Kaelah's Corner post a month. Or for answering e-mails (my apologies to those of you who have written to me and didn’t get a reply, I’m still planning to get back to you sometime in the future). My job, the kids, our project, looking after a family member who is suffering from health problems, and trying to work on my own health was as much as I could handle. Moreover, my libido was down to almost zero and there weren’t any kinky thoughts on my mind. So, what could I have written about, anyway?

The situation is slowly starting to get back to normal again, but it probably won’t be fully resolved until autumn next year. I hope I will be able to resume blogging earlier, but I don’t know when exactly this will be.

Still, Ludwig and I definitely wanted to use this occasion to say hello to all of you and tell you we are still around and that we will be back, too. Until then, we hope you are well and enjoy kinky fun or at least kinky erotic fantasies despite the pandemic and the still dramatic situation all over the planet.

Thirteenth Blogiversary

“Man plans, and God laughs.” Even though I’m an atheist, the meaning of this old Yiddish saying resonates with me: life is full of uncertainty. This was especially true in 2020, when the COVID-19 pandemic disrupted all our lives.

Thankfully, Kaelah and I were able to deal with it relatively well. As parents of two young children, we didn’t have much of a social life in recent years, even before the pandemic. So that wasn’t really new for us. We were also used to working from home already. As a result, we were relatively well prepared for the new situation. Still, the last ten months have been quite stressful and taxing for us, as they undoubtedly were for all of you.

Returning to blogging or editing kinky videos wasn’t an option for me under the circumstances. There simply wasn’t enough time, and even if there had been, I probably wouldn’t have been in the right mood for kinky writing or kinky filmmaking. Kaelah continued to keep the blog going on a semi-regular basis, and that was all we were able to do.

The COVID-19 pandemic reminds us what is really important in life, and needless to say, there are more important things than BDSM – in order to have a healthy and fulfilling sex life, you have to be healthy in the first place. So, I hope that you are all doing okay, that you stay safe and that you aren’t suffering from cabin fever quite yet. Let’s hope that we can all return to some semblance of normalcy over the course of 2021.

In any case, since I started this blog on 25th January 2008, today is my thirteenth blogiversary. I’m using this occasion to give you a quick heads-up, and basically, everything I wrote this time last year still applies: as soon as I get enough time, I’m going to write a couple of posts which I still need to write in order to tie up some loose ends, and I’m going to edit and publish a couple of videos which Kaelah and I have already shot. I can’t promise you when that will be, but I can promise you that we won’t close down the blog until everything is finished. We also still have a major F/M video to shoot, and I hope to get that done sometime this year as well.

In the meantime, take care of yourselves, and hang in there. I’m optimistic that the COVID-19 situation is going to improve significantly in the coming months, due to warmer weather and mass vaccinations. And hopefully, we will all be able to go back to doing the things we like – including BDSM and blogging.

Twelfth Blogiversary

Twelve years ago, on the 25th of January 2008, I started this blog. Back then, George W. Bush was President of the United States, Lehman Brothers wasn’t bankrupt yet, the UK was still firmly a member of the EU, Bitcoin hadn’t been invented, and while there was talk about climate change from people who understood the science, it wasn’t nearly as ubiquitous a topic as it is today. In many ways, it was quite a different era. As for me, I was still relatively young, single, and new to the BDSM and spanking scene (which itself was pretty different from what it is today). So I started blogging about my exploits. Little did I know that I would meet my future wife through this blog, and that we would have two little children by 2020.

As you can see, the blog hasn’t been very active in recent years. Kaelah keeps it going with semi-regular posts, but I haven’t been able to return to blogging in 2019 as I had hoped. It was another very busy year for us. We had our kids to look after (life with two small children is never, ever quiet), our jobs, and another big project to manage together which I can’t really write about here because it is a private matter, except to say that it took up a lot of our time and energy. There was very little spare time, and truth be told, kink was rarely on my mind. On those occasions when I had a few hours for myself, I just wanted to rest.

So, I regret that I haven’t posted anything since this time last year, but as Joe Pesci’s character says in Martin Scorsese’s excellent new film The Irishman: "It is what it is." It is my intention to get back to blogging as soon as I get a little extra time again and, with it, the necessary inspiration. Hopefully, that will be sooner rather than later - after all, the children are growing, they will be spending more time in kindergarten as they get older, and the big project I mentioned earlier has just reached an important milestone.

One thing which I’ve promised you many times, dear readers, and which I can promise you again today is that Kaelah and I won’t close down the blog before I’ve written the posts I still want to write to tie up some loose ends (finishing this series of posts, for instance), or before we have edited and posted the videos we have already shot. There is also one major video still to shoot, the severe F/M caning scene which we’ve been planning for years. I definitely want to do that in 2020. Actually, I’m not really looking forward to doing it, but I owe it to Kaelah in return for the severe caning videos which she has done as a bottom, and I am looking forward to seeing the finished video.

So, I thank you all for sticking with us and reading our blog for another year. I’ll do my best to return to blogging semi-regularly as soon as I can. And I hope that you all continue to have a great year 2020 in the meantime - happy, healthy, and with some exciting kinky play every now and then.

Eleventh Blogiversary

I started this blog on the 25th of January 2008. That was eleven years ago, and it actually feels more like twenty-one or thirty-one years ago to me. My life was very, very different back then compared to today. I was single, I was fairly new to the BDSM scene, and BDSM played a much more important role in my life at the time (which is why I started blogging about it). And when I started the blog, I could never, ever have imagined that I would meet my future wife because of it and that we would have two children a decade later.

So, anyway, today is my eleventh blogiversary. On the one hand, it is a cause for celebration, because very few blogs last that long - even in a semi-active state. On the other hand, I am saddened by the fact that I didn't have time to return to blogging or edit any of our spanking videos in 2018, either. I keep having to postpone it, then another year begins, and I write another blogiversary post where I explain how busy I have been... I'm starting to feel like a broken record.

What makes me feel a little better about the blog is that, by now, Kaelah has revealed to you that we've become the parents of two adorable children in the last couple of years. Truth be told, I was hesitant about letting you, the readers, in on this fact, because I am a very private person and I don't like sharing private information that isn't directly related to kink. This is, after all, an erotic blog about adult consensual CP. It isn't a diary, and it isn't about the other aspects of my life or of my personality. However, now that you know Kaelah and I are parents, you are able to understand why we have been so busy. I don't have to make obscure references to "real life duties" and "we've had many things to take care of". Instead, I can just tell you openly what is going on. And hopefully, you can now appreciate much better why the blog hasn't exactly been a beehive of activity lately.

In January last year, I was genuinely optimistic that this would be the year when I can return to blogging, finally edit and publish those old spanking videos Kaelah and I filmed, and wrap everything up. Kaelah and I had married by that point, we had moved in together, we had even begun to settle into our new role as parents and become accustomed to our routines in that area - okay, I thought, maybe I can even get back to blogging this year. But it was not to be. Before long, we were once again swamped with work. Among other things, as Kaelah already mentioned to you, there was a death in the family, and taking care of all the business that has to be done in the aftermath literally kept us busy for months. That, plus my usual job, plus the two children... There were quite a few nights last summer when I only slept for three or four hours.

Fortunately, that year is behind us now, and things have begun to quiet down a little. Actually, life with two active little toddlers is never really quiet, but it's not as hellishly hectic any more as it was a couple of months ago. So, we will see. I am once again optimistic that this is going to be the year when Ludwig makes a proper return. But I am also cautious, and reluctant to make promises I can't keep.

What I can promise you is that, someday, you will get to read the final series of posts I have been talking about - I still have to wrap up a few things here -  and I will edit the videos Kaelah and I have filmed so you can finally see them. I don't know when that will be, exactly, but it is definitely going to happen, and this blog is not closing down before it happens. It isn't closing down, either, until Kaelah and I have filmed and published one last F/M caning video we are planning (I am not looking forward to the filming of it at all, but getting to see it and publish it should be nice!).

With that, I wish all of you a happy and healthy 2019. Thank you for sticking with us even during the times when the blog isn't very active. Kaelah and I will do our best to make it worth your wait, hopefully this year.

Global Day(s) of Delurk 2018 (Day 2): 1 + 1 = 4

This is the second day of this year's LOL Day event, and today's post will be the most personal and intimate one ever on this blog - which is saying a lot. As I explained yesterday, LOL Day 2008 was the very starting point of our relationship and of Ludwig's and my crazy kinky and vanilla journey that finally resulted in our marriage.

Since then our blogging has become rather infrequent, though. There were several reasons for this. After years filled with lots of kinky experiments and experiences, that part of our life had become less important. Plus, our vanilla life was very busy – job responsibilities, household chores, time with family and friends, a few minor health issues and even medical emergencies in our family.

But that wasn't the whole story. This blog has always been first and foremost about kink. In addition to that we have shared a few things about our development as a couple. It never was and never will be a vanilla couple's blog, though. We don't write posts about the two of us doing laundry together. And while we are very open about our kink, our erotic exploits and our relationship, we are very careful to protect the privacy of our vanilla environment.

That's why Ludwig and I were pondering for a while whether we should share this very special, intimate thing with you or not. But since it might actually be the most important step in our relationship, and since it explains why we have hardly had any time for kink or blogging, we finally decided to let you in on this very personal development. In a recent series of posts, I wrote about a special and rather painful event that altered our life. Some of you already figured out what I was writing about.

Here is the solution of the riddle (which will hopefully also explain why I left out a few details in my account): As the long-time readers among you might remember, I always wanted children. I already pondered the question how to handle our kinkiness with little ones being around long before Ludwig and I were even married. Ludwig wanted kids, too, and our dream has come true. As a matter of fact, today we already are parents of not only one, but two wonderful little ones, a  girl and a boy!

We ask for your understanding that we won't share any more information about the two for the reasons mentioned above. But we hope that the revelation of our parenthood helps you understand why kink and erotic adventures don't play such an important role in our relationship any more, at least for the time being, and why keeping up this blog has been so difficult in the recent past.

I hope that you feel happy for us, despite the negative effects on our blogging. And I can only encourage the silent readers among you who ask themselves whether they should take the plunge and follow their kinky dreams and fantasies to sincerely consider doing so. As you can see, it can lead to things you might never have thought possible, which go far beyond erotic adventures. Or at least you might very probably find some kind new friends here in the spanking community. You are definitely very welcome to write a comment on our blog, share your experiences and ask questions anytime! A Happy LOL Day to all of you and thank you for reading!

Tenth Blogiversary

Today is my tenth blogiversary. It was on 25th January 2008 that I started Rohrstock-Palast with my first post, titled The Mad King. I've said this before and I dislike repeating myself, but it really does feel like a different lifetime. A decade is a fairly long time in any life, and I went through some substantial changes since that younger guy wrote that first post here. Most importantly, I met Kaelah through this blog, which was the beginning of many adventures for us.

By now, we have moved in together, we are happily married, and we are taking on the responsibilities which tend to pile up as one enters middle age - including taking care of loved ones. 2017 was our busiest year yet, and certainly the busiest year I've had in my entire life so far. That, in itself, is not a bad thing, I suppose - it is better to be busy than to be bored. But it does leave almost no time and energy for kink, blogging or other hobbies. This time last year, I was sincerely hoping to get back to writing posts at least semi-regularly. But it turned out that that simply wasn't possible. First I had more projects than anticipated to take care of in my job, then Kaelah was ill for quite some time, then one of our family members had a medical emergency that required a lot of organisational work from us, then we had to take care of all the stuff that had been left unattended to in the meantime... Whenever one crisis was finally taken care of, another one popped up. And it's still like that. Actually, the last couple of days have been extremely hectic once again, and I certainly wouldn't be writing a post today if it weren't for the fact that this is my tenth blogiversary, which I can't possibly miss.

So, everything I wrote on my last blogiversary still applies. I still have to edit at least five videos which have already been filmed, and we have at least one more to film. I still hope to return to blogging. I still can't make any firm promises about when that will be.

I wish I could offer you more in celebration of this blogiversary. But even though Rohrstock-Palast hasn't seen many new posts lately, I am still proud that we have reached the ten-year milestone. Most blogs never get anywhere near that, even in a semi-active state. And we do have some great posts and videos still to come before we are finished. So, in the meantime, I would like to ask you to continue to be patient, and I would like to thank you again for sticking with us for all these years.

Let's hope that 2018 will have fewer crises in store for us than the previous year and that, as a result, we can be more prolific on the blog again. I keep my fingers crossed!

Ninth Blogiversary

Today is the ninth blogiversary of Rohrstock-Palast, which I started back in the prehistoric era of 2008. To my horror and amazement, I just discovered that my last post was exactly one year ago - on the eighth blogiversary. Never before has there been such a gap between posts of mine. If it weren't for Kaelah, this blog would be well and truly dead. I suppose we should rename it Kaelah's Rohrstock-Palast.

Obviously, I have not been a very eager blogger this past year, and in the years before when my posts were already pretty rare. I could say that I am very busy with my job and other real-life duties, but that would not be the entire truth. Of course, I could still find at least some free time for blogging - an hour here, an hour there. But blogging can become a job of sorts (it certainly was for me for several years), and I really don't feel like taking on an extra job during what little free time I have at the moment. I just lack the energy and the inspiration for that. Unlike Kaelah, who is much better at multi-tasking, I tend to do things excessively or not at all. Moreover, as I have already said in the past, I've covered almost everything I wanted to write about here, I've done almost every video that was realistically feasible, and there aren't many ideas left that really spark my imagination. Whatever remains to do feels rather like cleaning up and filling in a couple of blanks - worthwhile, but not exactly super-exciting.

That said, it's not like I lost my interest in the blog completely. I still follow everything Kaelah writes, she consults me about almost every post, and I proof-read every one of them. I also still read all the comments. And I can say that my spanking fantasies have become more frequent and more vivid again than they were in the recent past - I guess the absence from the day in, day out job of blogging has helped to re-ignite my kink somewhat. While it probably will never be as existentially important to me again as it was a decade ago when I was a wide-eyed newbie to the spanking community, it's definitely stronger than, say, a year or two ago.

In November 2014, Kaelah and I announced that we would close down the blog the following spring. That was more than two years ago now - so much for things going according to plan! Rest assured, we weren't trying to tease you or play a joke on you. At the time, we really did intend to do precisely what we said we would. But we severely underestimated the time and effort required for the final "firework" of posts and finished videos which we wanted to do, which would have overtaxed us at the best of times - and overtaxed us all the more when our free time became much rarer during the following months and years. Moreover, you know how it is: once you lose touch with any hobby or activity like blogging, it's all the more difficult to get back to a frequent routine.

But enough with the whining and excuses. A blogiversary is a day to celebrate. I am happy that Rohrstock-Palast has made it to the ripe old age (for a blog) of nine years, and I am glad that we still have readers left even though our activity level - mine in particular - has not been great. Thank you for that. Now that we have got to nine, we might as well make the decade complete and go to ten. So you will get to enjoy the blog for at least one more year. And I do sincierely hope and intend to write more again.

There is also the not-so-small matter of editing at least five videos which we have already shot (preview pictures of some of them can be seen in Klingons Do Not Faint!, My First Day At School - On Camera! and A Creative Valentine's Weekend). Some of the material is almost as old as the blog itself, and from that point of view, it's outright ridiculous that it still hasn't been published. But I tell you honestly, it includes the best stuff we have ever filmed, and I want to get it just right. I need inspiration for that, which I haven't had in recent years. Hopefully, I'll have it in 2017. Last but not least, we also have at least one more scene to film. As Kaelah loves to remind me, we are still missing a severe, 50 stroke F/M caning in order to complete our array of videos and restore some balance after several hard caning videos which Kaelah has done as a bottom. I keep telling her that we only have very few fans of F/M stuff and that no one would want to see it, but she is not buying it.

As you can see, we still have some exciting spanking porn masterpieces in the pipeline before we finally say farewell, and I still have a couple of things I would really like to write about. I am not going to give you any schedules or deadlines, because we have done that in the past, and we haven't been able to meet them. I'm taking the George R. R. Martin approach: it'll be done when it's done, I don't know when, but winter is coming. Definitely.

In the meantime, thank you very much for reading and commenting for another year. I'll write more posts than I did last year - that much I can safely promise, I think. Here's to a good kinky season of 2017. Let's see what the future brings.

Your Questions Answered (Part 2)

This is our the second set of answers to the question posed by our readers. You can find the first Q&A instalment here. Thank you very much to our readers who came up with all those intriguing topics!

Our Bottoms Burn (Bogey) asked: "Would like to know your thoughts while you are spanking your husband."

That depends on the situation! Since Ludwig doesn't switch that often, many of the times I got to spank him were for video clips. In that case I am usually very much focussed on the creative process, the scenario, the camera angles, the speed, my aim, Ludwig's reactions and the marks. I don't really enjoy the spanking while it happens, then, but rather enjoy the result afterwards.

Sometimes I also spank Ludwig (often spontaneously) in private. Then I am usually focussed on teasing and pushing him a bit and on creating reactions which I enjoy immensely during the spanking. I suppose I am in full sadist mode then. Of course not in a way that I want to harm Ludwig. I only love provoking reactions and creating marks to an extend which I know is fine for Ludwig as well. Ludwig relishes being spanked the most when the spanker genuinely enjoys it as well. And he likes me to be in a demanding toppy mode when I spank him.

I also had some rare experiences when spanking Ludwig got me into a special flow that was almost meditative. In that state I am rather focussed on the rhythm of the spanking and on myself. Of course a part of me still has an eye on whether Ludwig is fine, but my main focus is on the act of spanking and how it feels for me. I wrote about such an experience in my post about the video clip which we filmed together with Leia-Ann Woods.

Spearthrower asked: "How do you manage the sound of spanking in the apartment and particularly when traveling?"

Well, our first advantage here is that both Ludwig and I aren't exactly noisy when being on the receiving end of a spanking. So, the only problem that remains is the sound of the spanking itself. At home that isn't really a problem because the walls are thick enough for the neighbours not to hear. When travelling it can be more difficult. Since we normally don't do very prolonged scenes, though, we usually rely on the hope that those who might coincidentally overhear the swishing sound of a cane or the clapping sound of a hand spanking won't be able to guess what it is and won't really care, either. I can't remember any incident when we for instance switched on the TV or played music in order to disguise the sound of a spanking as I have heard others sometimes do.

Svetlana asked: "If (a) either of you individually and (b) both of you together could make an under-cover visit to the past for one day to either observe or experience historical corporal punishment, what place and time would you choose?"

We are going to answer that question separately.

Kaelah: That's a very difficult question! At first I thought about, for instance, the punishment of a navy cadet in the 19th century or a school punishment or something like that. But I have the following problem: While I find certain formal historic punishment scenarios erotic as kinky role-play fantasies, I find the real thing morally wrong and disgusting and don't want any part of it!

So, the only kind of real CP I can imagine myself to watch is consensual CP between adults. I don't know for which historical scenario that would be given, but I know one place were that kind of consensual CP still happens today. The form of “CP” (if one can even call it that) which I am talking about is something I came across in a documentary some years ago which thrilled me. I am talking about a stick being used as a motivational instrument during a sumo training session.

In Japanese the rather rough treatment of new recruits at a stable is called "kawaigatte" which means "to treat lovingly". One might think that this is irony, but it is not meant to be, because the harsh treatment is indeed supposed to make the new rikishi work as hard as he possibly can and therefore find his way to the top.

I guess that is a kind of spanking that would have an erotic appeal for me although it is real and no erotic play. But it would only be okay for me if I had the feeling that the recruits involved have really voluntarily chosen to become a sumo wrestler, knowing about the training methods. And if I had the feeling that the trainers really care for their protégés and don't overdo it. So maybe I would indeed choose a historical scenario involving one of the rikishis at the receiving end who later became successful sumo wrestlers. Since I was a huge sumo fan and watched sumo very regularly about fifteen years ago, that would probably be someone like Musashimaru, Kotonishiki or Wakanohana.

Ludwig: I have the same problem as Kaelah. Because I'm against real (i.e. non-consensual) CP, I don't believe I could eroticise watching it, no matter how much I might enjoy seeing the same scenario acted out as a role-play by a couple of consenting kinksters. Moreover, I find that my CP fantasies are often based on good CP porn videos I've seen rather than on actual reality, and these videos themselves are only very loosely based on reality. To name an example: as I mentioned several times on this blog, I like the Headmaster's Study series by Lupus Pictures. I might incorporate a scene like that into my fantasies. However, when you think about it, the action being shown there is not realistic at all. Did you ever hear about a female pupil being tied to a CP bench, totally naked, and given 50 hard cane strokes? Things like that never happened, not even in 19th century Bohemia.

In short, I tend to build my fantasies out of things I've seen in film rather than first-hand historical accounts. I suppose I can answer your question like this: I would not be interested in observing historical CP, but I would have loved being a fly on the wall while the filming of some of my favourite CP videos took place.

Your Questions Answered (Part 1)

In my last Kaelah's Corner post I invited you to ask Ludwig and me questions. I wasn't sure whether anyone would have any questions at all, but to my surprise five of our readers came up with very interesting ones. Since the topics you raised could each have been the theme for a separate post, our detailed answers will be published in two posts. That also gives those who haven't posed a question, yet, but would like to do so a few more days to write a comment. So here are our answers (which I have written in cooperation with Ludwig) to the first two questions :

Michael M asked: "Now that you have been together for so long has the interest in spanking each other tailed off a bit?"

Yes, it has. There are several reasons for this, I think.

First of all, I guess it is quite normal that new couples engage in sexual activities more often than couples who have been together for a long time. Having sex (and spanking for us is a part of that) is a way of getting to know each other and of being close to each other at a time when one's partner is still almost a stranger. This becomes less important when the partners know each other very well and share their daily life which involves lots of activities other than sex that bring the partners closer.

In addition to that, during our first years together, Ludwig and I were in a long-distance relationship. We saw each other only about every two weeks and when we did, we were in a holiday mood. So, spanking also was a way to bring us closer and enjoy a weekend off when we only had a rather limited time together and no shared obligations. Today we have a busy daily life with lots of vanilla responsibilities which makes it more difficult for us to get in the mood for planning and doing a spanking scene.

Then for Ludwig, spanking was always the most interesting in combination with making videos. Even when we started out as a couple, Ludwig was perfectly happy with private scenes to remain rare. His kinky mood usually heightened when we were in the stage of planning a video shoot or at least other kinky activities for the blog. Now we have realised almost every video idea that was important to us and it was clear from the beginning that our kinky activities would decrease once this state was reached.

As for me, I was absolutely new to spanking when Ludwig and I played for the very first time. As you can imagine, I was like a kid in a candy shop back then and wanted to try out many different things. Since then, I have done a lot of scenes that intrigued me, created videos, wrote blog posts, read blogs and spanking stories, watched kinky videos and so on, and the initial focus on kink to the exclusion of everything else has gone away.

Last but not least, when we came together, Ludwig was already an experienced top and I was the newbie who let him guide me into this strange new world. Later, when I felt ready, we switched places from time to time and I was allowed to top the man who was mostly a top himself. Both premises made it rather easy to come up with scenarios and imagine each other in opposed kinky roles. Since Ludwig and I now organise so many things as a team, though, and know each other so extremely well, it has at least for me become less easy to get into a toppy or bottom mindset with him or to imagine Ludwig as a fictional character for a role-play scenario. Today it's sometimes easier for me to see us for instance topping others together at a play event than to get in the mood for a scene that has the two of us on different sides of the game.

Simon asked: "If you are punished by or punish someone else how is it different to punishing each other?"

I hope it is okay that I'll translate "punish" as "spank" because, as you know, we don't do real discipline spankings and even most of our role-play scenarios aren't punishment scenes, either.

I think the difference is that spanking play between Ludwig and me is usually more intimate than spanking play with others. Often the spanking will lead to vanilla sex, something we don't share with others.

The exception from that rule is when we make a video clip together, because then others are involved through the camera. When we make videos, we are very much focussed on the creative process and the final clip. One of our last video clips together (the new professor) was the first time Ludwig had enjoyed the build-up and the caning while it happened and not only later when he watched the film material we produced.

Playing with others, on the other hand, makes it easier for us to engage in role-play scenarios. The reason is that there is at least a certain distance between us and the other participants, as they are acquaintances or friends at most and we don't share our daily life with them and don't know them as extremely well as we know each other. That makes it a lot easier to imagine them as a certain role-play character and to get into a role-play character, too. It also makes it a bit easier to experiment with things, because if something doesn't work out as planned, the disappointment doesn't afflict our relationship as much as a failed scene between the two of us might.

Playing with others can also give us a special thrill in the sense that, for instance, getting naked or telling the other to strip is different with a stranger. Between the two of us it of course isn't such a special thing anymore, since we have seen each other nude hundreds of times and as lovers don't feel strange being nude in front of one another at all.

Kaelah's Corner (Mar 2016): On Being Mr and Mrs Rohrstock-Palast

Yes, it's true, folks! Ludwig and I are finally married. While other couples split up after seven years, we decided it was a good time to take the next step.

As you can imagine, I am not the princess type. So, there were no white horses, no carriage, no heart-shaped balloons (or white doves) or any of that stuff. Just a little ceremony followed by a party with family and friends, involving good food, lovely conversation and lots of (progressive) rock and metal music.

I didn't wear a white wedding dress, either. First of all, I don't see why I should spend so much money on a dress which I only wear once in my life. Second, white is a colour that doesn't suit me. And third, wearing a white wedding dress (the colour of innocence) simply would have been a lie! :-) So, I wore my Chinese wedding dress which harmonized wonderfully with the bridal bouquet in warm colours that Ludwig had chosen. Ludwig wore an elegant suit and looked very handsome.

Some of you might remember that I have written about my commitment phobia a while ago. We took that into account by tailoring the event according to our needs and to who we really are. No vows to love each other forever (don't get me wrong, that's of course the plan, but I don't think it's something one can promise to another person), no talk about how we can't stop thinking about each another or about wanting to be together 24/7 (a horrible idea) or about how futile our lives would be without each other (we both wouldn't want to be with a person whose only sense in life comes from being with a partner).

Instead we made a little funny, tongue-in-cheek presentation about our history and years together and the time to come. Well, at least about those parts one would want to tell one's granny about! ;-) It was a very relaxed day, much more than we had expected. And we got the most wonderful compliment that I can imagine by several of our guests. Apart from telling us that they enjoyed the party and felt very comfortable and welcome, they said that they had rarely seen a bride and groom who were so relaxed and easy-going on their wedding day!

Let's hope that this is a good omen for our upcoming years together as Mr and Mrs!

Eighth Blogiversary

Today is the eighth blogiversary of Rohrstock-Palast. Two years ago, I celebrated what is arguably the pefect number of years for a spanking blog: "six of the best". Last year, it was six of the best plus one. But I've run out of clever numerical interpretations now. I suppose it will just have to be number eight this year, plain and simple.

On second thoughts, the saying "eight is enough" comes to mind. I do expect this to be my final blogiversary. Then again, I said the same thing last year, and that obviously did not turn out as planned. As I wrote in my new year's post a few weeks ago, the blog will be going on a while longer, until we have edited and published all the videos we still have in store and wrapped up a couple of other things. It's difficult to find time for blogging and editing while Kaelah and I still have much work to do from the house move and various other things, but we will be slowly and steadily moving forward. In the meantime, you can all enjoy our ramblings a bit longer.

However, on this particular day, I find myself looking backward rather than forward. It's surreal to think that I started this blog fully eight years ago, on 25th January 2008. It almost seems like a different life. Certainly a very different phase of the same life. There were some big changes going on for me in 2008. One of them was starting this blog and embarking on this kind of strange, semi-public life in the online BDSM community. But that wasn't even the biggest change back then. There were others as well. And at the end of that year, I first "met" Kaelah when she delurked here on this blog. We first met face-to-face in the beginning of 2009, and the rest is history. Now I feel as if we have known each other forever. The more time passes, the more difficult I find it to think back to a time when we weren't together and to truly remember what life felt like then.

What I am trying to say, I guess, is that Rohrstock-Palast has become a boring couples blog after all, despite my strenuous attempts to avoid just that! And now that it has, I am very happy with it.

Most of the kinky people whom I was friends with in 2008, and who commented here on my earliest posts, are no longer around. They left the scene years ago. Some I am still in contact with, sporadically. Others have disappeared completely and I have no idea what they are doing today. It makes me sad sometimes. Rest assured, I am grateful for all the readers we have today, all the people who discovered this blog maybe three years ago, or one year ago, or just very recently. And whenever someone writes a comment, that is a nice thing, regardless of how long they have been around. I am grateful for all of you. But I do miss the old "gang" sometimes, the people who inspired me to start blogging in the first place. Niki Flynn, Indy, Adele Haze, Prefectdt... I do miss them. Perhaps that's what growing old feels like. People around you disappear one after the other, until eventually, you are the last one standing. In blogging, it only takes eight years rather than eighty.

So, I find that the eighth blogiversary is a happy date to celebrate, but mixed with quite a bit of melancholy. One eye laughing, the other weeping, that sort of thing. And before I spout off any more tiresome clichés, I had better wrap things up. Thank you for reading, as always. And stay tuned for what is still to come.

Happy New Year 2016!

Kaelah and I would like to wish you all a Happy New Year 2016. We hope that you had a "guten Rutsch", as the German saying goes, i.e. a good transition. We wish you contentment, good health and many happy hours with the people who are dear to you. Last but not least, we also wish you exciting kinky adventures in the coming twelve months.

This time last year, we did not expect that we would still be writing right now. As we had announced the previous November, it was our plan to close down the blog sometime during the spring or the summer at the latest, after a final, intense fireworks display of posts and videos. But things turned out differently. We both had a lot more work and other real-life duties to take care of in 2015 than we had anticipated. Among other things, we decided to move in together, which is happy news, but obviously takes a lot of time and work away from any kinky projects. Less happily, Kaelah went through a phase when she wasn't feeling fit and had to rest more than usual due to health reasons. Thankfully, it wasn't anything serious or permanent, and she is feeling much better by now. But again, it meant that she was not able to write for the blog or edit videos as often as she would have liked.

So, while we still plan on closing down the blog, the final phase is going slower and taking much longer than expected. We now intend to make our last post sometime in the autumn of 2016, which seems a fairly realistic date given all the videos we still want to edit and publish and all the other things we still have to wrap up. But keep in mind that this is a tentative date, and liable to be pushed back further if more unforseen developments crop up.

We still haven't published most of the videos we mentioned in the Happy New Year 2015 post, and made a couple more in 2015, like this school-themed one and that one outdoors. All in all, we have half a dozen videos in the pipeline, some of which are longer and more elaborate than anything we have done before. In addition, I plan on finally finishing Ludwig's story (my BDSM autobiography, as it were) and write down some other long-planned posts which will hopefully be of interest to you before I retire from blogging.

My only kinky new year resolution, then, is to try and get back to a more regular posting schedule than in 2015, and edit all of the videos we still have in store. What about you? Any specific spanking-related plans or resolutions for 2016?

500 Posts!

Yes, indeed, this is our 500th post! But that's not all. In only a few hours' time we will hit the 2.5 million page views mark. And I am quite confident that with your help we will make it to 5,000 comments soon as well (we already have over 4,900 published comments right now).

Since we definitely won't make it to 1,000 posts before closing down this blog, we decided that 500 posts is a number worth mentioning and celebrating. And another chance to thank you for following us and making blogging worthwhile!

Looking back, it is exciting to see how the blog has changed over time. In 2008 Ludwig started out as a solo-blogger. In his second post, titled What's On the Menu?, he explained his approach as follows:

Actually, humour (the black comedy, politically incorrect, hopefully non-lame kind) will be one of the main themes here. If BDSM isn't fun and a little tongue-in-cheek, something is wrong. Mind you, I take our kink awfully seriously – it's dark, obsessive, edgy and highly erotic. But at the same time, all these delightful fantasies of ours (the sassy schoolgirls, military tribunals and damsels in distress) are also ripe for some good affectionate lampooning. So I hope to add my own contribution to that.

It will offset the lengthy theoretical ramblings somewhat, which I also aim to provide. To me, spanking goes beyond the mere immediate turn-on, it is utterly fascinating on a psychological and philosophical level. And it leads to all kinds of tantalizing questions about us as human beings, individuals and members of society. There is a danger for these explorations to get all analytical and lose sight of the eroticism. Avoiding that, though, and keeping it in balance, they can be just as much of a kick.

Above all, BDSM and erotic corporal punishment is an artform to me. Both the "performance" itself and the "artifacts" we make, the films, images and stories. I've always been particularly intrigued by movies because they are a sort of hybrid - "slice of life" and yet a "permanent item". Naturally, being a film buff makes me a spanking film buff as well. Notwithstanding the fact that the genre as a whole is inherently goofy (as it should be), I view the good spanking movies as genuine works of art. So that will be the third theme of the blog, reviews and armchair criticism.

These three themes indeed proved to be vital parts of this blog – as of today we have 36 posts labeled as spanking humour, 30 philosophical ramblings and 55 movie and website reviews.

In 2009 Ludwig's happy little world got turned upside down, though, because Kaelah turned up and we became a couple. In 2010, Kaelah started writing about her thoughts on this blog as well, at first only in her monthly personal guest column Kaelah's Corner. Today we have 69 posts under this label.

At the same time, Ludwig (and later Kaelah as well) started to venture into the world of kinky porn, with both amateur as well as the professional videos. And so there are 20 posts about making art on this blog, plus 18 posts about our videos. Since Kaelah also loves taking photos, there are 69 posts labeled as our pictures, too.

The main change that happened, though, is that as a couple we also started to write more about our own kinky play and our relationship. In other words, this blog almost turned into one of the lame couple blogs Ludwig always disliked. You can read about our boring adventures under the label which has the highest number of posts so far – the private exploits label with 89 posts. This way, a lot of our development as a couple over the past years is reflected in our posts.

But not only our life and our blog have changed, the kinky online and blogging community have changed as well. Yesterday Ludwig reminded me of the time when a rather big group of (British) spanking models had their own rather active blogs. There was a lot of back and forth between, for instance, Niki Flynn and Adele Haze, who had a very lively commentership as well. Those blogs are gone and so are many fellow bloggers and commenters we interacted with throughout the years. But of course new people have come, too, and it is still a great event for us when a new commenter shows up on our blog to say hello.

So, this post is in memory of all the fellow kinksters who have come and gone during our time here in the kinky community. Thank you for having shared your thoughts with us! We would also like to encourage those silent readers who are still unsure whether they should say hi. The spanking community is very welcoming and it is a lot of fun to participate. And don't be afraid of being the newbie – the online community changes rather fast. Today you may be the new commenter / blogger, in a few months you are already considered an experienced community member!

Oh, and how do you think should we celebrate? Maybe a 500 strokes spanking? I am not sure whether we have ever done such a long scene, since Ludwig prefers shorter, more intense ones. Any other ideas? You are very welcome to share them in the comment section!

Ludwig and Kaelah

Seventh Blogiversary

In 2014, I celebrated what I called "the perfect anniversary for a spanking blog": six of the best! This year, I suppose I am celebrating six of the best plus one. One for luck? One for wisdom? Either way, seven is still a pretty nice number, even though it lacks the spankophile significance of its predecessor.

Only a small handful of kinky blogs reach the venerable age of seven years, and I am proud that Rohrstock-Palast is among them. It's an achievement I share with Kaelah, of course - while I started the blog back in 2008, she ended up writing the majority of the posts after she came on board as my mate and co-author. Kaelah and I becoming a couple is, for me looking back, the most unforseen and the most fortunate event to result from this blog. Plus, there were some other, pretty amazing adventures as well.

As we wrote in The Final Countdown, the time of this blog will soon come to an end. We know that the prospect saddens you, as it saddens us. But the reasons we gave in November's post still apply for me: I feel that I have done pretty much everything I wanted to do here, and after seven years of spanking blogging, there are other, non-kinky projects I would rather undertake in my limited spare time.

However, the blog will go on a little longer than we originally planned. Because of the aforementioned limited spare time, it turns out that things take longer to wrap up than anticipated. There are still videos to edit, and as they include what I regard as our best ones, I want to do a good and thorough job with them. There are also quite a few instalments left in Ludwig's Story, long posts that take time and inspiration as well. And some more things. I expect that the blog will go on until the end of March at least.

Nonetheless, this will definitely be my last blogiversary. It is an appropriate time to thank all of you readers, old and new, for staying with us, leaving your comments and making the blog fun and worthwhile for us for so many years. Thank you so much for that!

Happy Holidays, Busy Holidays

Kaelah and I would like to wish all of you happy holidays and a "guten Rutsch" into the year 2015. We had a nice Christmas dinner yesterday (as you may know, Germans celebrate on the 24th) and an altogether lovely start to the holiday season. Now, we are going to spend the final days of the year meeting family and friends, but also enjoying time together with just the two of us.

Unfortunately, we do not have a Christmas present for you this year. Not an audio story like last year, not a set of pictures as in 2012, and not a video clip as in some of the years before that. Sorry about that. Then again, given that we published our Office Discipline video only a month ago and some Santa Claus-themed pictures in early December, maybe you will find it in your hearts to forgive us. It is the season of love, after all.

The upside: the reason why we do not have a present this year is not that we are slacking off, but quite the contrary. I've been busy editing the severe 50 stroke caning scene which Kaelah and I filmed back in 2009, which we aim to finally publish before we close the blog next spring. The preview picture we posted is one of our most popular pictures ever. I intended to have the video ready for publication by today, but it turned out to be a very complicated editing job and simply too much work for the time available (trying to cut down several hours of "documentary footage" we shot so that the video contains all the interesting bits without becoming overlong and indigestible). So I have to postpone it until January. We also have some other videos in the pipeline, including the two shorter ones left over from our LOL day vote and some great and yet unpublished stuff we filmed years ago with Pandora Blake.

Moreover, we might use the holidays for some additional CP action for you to see. For one thing, I still have a bare bottom flogging coming to me from our betting on the Football World Cup, and Kaelah a hand spanking. You will get to see pictures of the results before too long.

Oh, and lastly, here is something I've been meaning to do for some time. Actually, maybe you can regard it as a Christmas present of sorts after all. I have added a new Our Pictures tag to all our picture posts which we have published over the years. While I'm the video buff, Kaelah is the photography buff among the two of us and it is past time to give all the beautiful photographs we have made (most of which were her idea and her work) a tag of their own so that you can find them more easily.

Happy holidays, everyone!

Ludwig's Story II: Video Voyeur

As I wrote in the first part of my story, my interest in depictions of spanking and corporal punishment started when I was no older than eight or nine. Needless to say, I had never heard of BDSM or sadomasochism at that age. I only knew that I had strange fantasies which were somehow "grown up" in nature and which none of the other kids seemed to share. I did not talk about them to anyone. In secret, I wondered whether I might be the only person in the world who had this fascination with spanking and CP.

My kinky fantasies had started before I even had an interest in sex (or a clear understanding of how it worked). A few years down the road, however, I did start having an interest in sex. More precisely, I started being interested in naked women. My parents had a handful of issues of Playboy magazine, which were lying around in our living room amidst a pile of various other magazines. Previously, I had not paid them any attention. I had known that they were there, but wasn't interested in them. I would rather look at the other magazines which had articles about computers and science. But at the age of thirteen or fourteen, I suddenly became very curious about the Playboy magazines. I would sneak down to our living room at night to look at them.

(By the way, here is something worth thinking about in the discussion about censoring adult content. The self-appointed moral guardians love trotting out their old canard about "the necessity to protect minors" from the evils of porn. However, as a number of psychological studies shows, there isn't any danger to minors, because 1) in order to find adult content on the internet, you have to actively search for it, and 2) children simply aren't interested in adult content until they reach the age of puberty and start becoming adults themselves. My own development would seem to confirm this.)

The magazines must have made an impression, because several decades later, I still remember the name of one playmate from back then: Celine Huber, who was "Miss October" in 1989 (the magazine must have been a few years old when I looked at it). She had a cute face and a rather spectacular figure, with a petite bottom that seemed destined to inspire spankophile daydreams. The other readers must have shared my enthusiasm: they voted Celine playmate of the year.

(Celine Huber, Miss October 1989, German edition of Playboy)

The late 80s and early 90s were also the time when the German "Privatsender", the privately financed TV channels not owned by the state, would show erotic films late at night during the weekend. Some of them were softcore productions that had been made for TV to begin with, others were hardcore productions with all the explicit bits edited out. Again, I would sneak down on Friday and Saturday nights, when my parents were already in bed, to watch these films. I watched quite a few over these years. Many were utterly awful garbage, like the upight petty bourgeois fantasies of the German School Girl Report series. Some others I found pretty hot, like the French sex films with a Marilyn Monroe-lookalike named Olinka. The stories in the latter were just as silly, mind you, but at least they had good-looking women, and despite the cuts, you could tell that people were having real sex. At school, chatter during recess revealed that other kids were watching these late-night films as well, including most of the boys and some of the girls. One female classmate of mine complained that more was shown of the naked women's bodies than of the naked men. She certainly had a point there.

(Another tidbit worth thinking about: anti-porn crusaders claim that men are "pornified" by watching adult films, turning them into misogynists who see women only as servile sex objects. For what it's worth, I can report that no such transformation took place in my case. Just as I understood that films like Lethal Weapon or Die Hard were not accurate portrayals of the life and work of police officers, I understood that what was shown in soft porn films on late night TV was not an accurate portrayal of how people have sex in real life. I understood that the bodybuilder and the two gals with the supermodel figures having a threesome by the waterfall was simply an erotic fantasy. It did not change how I thought about women. I daresay that if men grow up to become misogynist jerks, there are other factors at play than pornography.)

After I started being interested in "normal" sex, my spanking fantasies subsided somewhat. One reason was that while there was a lot of sex in late night erotic films, scenes of spanking and CP were much more difficult to find. There were a few scenes like that in the school films and pirate films I already knew, but almost all of them were male on male, and none of them were made to be erotic. So I kept wondering whether I might be the only person in the world who would want to see spanking with an erotic "buzz" to it, and preferably with the opposite sex involved. I received the answer to that question one weekend night when I had once again snuck down from my room to watch an adult film on our TV.

What turned out to be a revelation began inauspiciously. As a matter of fact, the film looked like utter crap. It was an older production from the 1970s. The story was about a boarding house run by a stern and puritanical widow. When a young and attractive pensioner from Norway moves in and does gymnastics in the nude, the other guests one by one get naughty and start having sex. It was daft even by porn standards. What was worse, the film's cast, except for one actress, was unattractive, and the sex scenes were lame. I had half a mind to stop watching and go back to bed, but I held out hope that there would be at least one good sex scene with the one attractive actress.

Towards the end of the film, the widow who owns the boarding house has thrown out all her guests. Depressed, she sits by the fireplace and starts looking through a large pile of erotic photographs and magazines left behind by one of the guests, first with revulsion, then with mounting curiosity and excitement. This leads to a weird (and clumsily edited) fantasy / dream sequence mixing flashbacks from the film so far with snippets from other 1970s erotic films. It was this fantasy sequence where things suddenly became very interesting, because many of these little snippets showed men and women whipping each other.

I was dumbfounded. Then ecstatic. The segment that made the biggest impression on me showed a man, who appeared to be a monk judging by his robes, lifting a woman's dress and thrashing her bottom with a short whip. I thought it was probably the sexiest thing I had ever seen. As is often the case with such Eureka experiences, it seemed as if someone had read my thoughts - rather, my erotic fantasies - and put this image I had always dreamed about right there in front of me, into the film. But the fact was, it wasn't me who had created that scene in the film, it was someone else. In this instant, it was clear that I was not the only person in the world who found depictions of spanking and CP erotic. Whoever had filmed this scene had the same fascination.

In the mainstream films, the whippings of sailors and other such CP scenes were not made to be erotic. But this scene clearly was. The young woman was whipped on her naked bottom. The monk was obviously enjoying it, grinning with sadistic glee. It was plain as day that this was intended to be an arousing scene, conceived by someone and produced for an audience who got excited by depictions of spanking and CP. There were other brief snippets of whipping in the sequence, including some F/M, but none were as good in my mind as the monk and the sexy lass.

Fortunately, the film was shown again the next night, at an even later time. I nicked a blank video cassette from my parents (they had so many that they did not notice) and recorded the scene so I could rewatch it whenever I wanted. One or two house moves later, I lost the cassette. I've been trying for years to find that whipping scene again. It is brief and very average, nothing special at all really, but it was the first glimpse of erotic corporal punishment I ever saw and held tremendous nostalgic value for me. But I did not remember the title of the film and it was such an old, obscure production that I searched in vain for a long time. Only recently did I finally find out which film it was (I browsed through old German TV schedules which are available online): La pension du libre amour, France, 1974. It was shown on German TV under the title Pension zur freien Liebe.

 (Whipping scene from La pension du libre amour)

 
In the following years, I found a few more decent spanking and CP scenes on television. I recorded them on my precious video cassette, the seed of a collection. I learned from passing mentions in magazine articles and books that some people had what was called an inclination for sadomasochism and practiced what was called BDSM. It was all rather simplified and superficial and left open a lot of questions. Was sadomasochism a sickness or not? Did it apply to me? I recognised that my faible for spanking scenes in films had something to do with this strange inclination, but I wasn't sure if I would like spanking in practice or if I ever wanted to try it out. So I probably wasn't a "true" sadomasochist. In any case, I was a virgin at the time and hadn't even experienced "normal" sex. The possibility of ever trying out BDSM seemed so remote and improbable that I never seriously thought about it.

By the turn of the millennium, I was an adult and online. The internet made finding kinky stuff so much easier. Not only were there websites listing CP scenes from mainstream films, like the fabulous Whipping Scenes in Movies Database. There was also a huge amount of porn showing real spankings, strappings, canings and so on. I was astonished by how many such videos existed and how widespread they were. Even porn paysites that featured mostly mainstream content often had some CP clips as well. Apparently, the number of people who were into this was much bigger than I had imagined.

This was the time when a video file of 10 MB was considered large and took a significant amount of time to download. Consequently, most of the CP I saw consisted of clips 10 to 30 seconds long. I found out later that many of my favourite snippets from that time were from California Star's English Discipline Series. Over the next couple of years, my internet connection gradually became faster and the files bigger. I discovered the Beach Girl Spankings videos by Raven Hill, which were interesting because of their "reality TV" vibe. Then, another major Eureka moment as I stumbled upon my first Rigid East film. The Czechs, who later became Lupus Pictures, made exactly the kind of CP video I had long fantasized about: very severe canings, great-looking girls, good stories, professional production. I wrote about the impact their videos had on me in my post The Company of Wolves.

While my video collection grew to be quite vast and I saw more and more CP action on the screen, I still had no practical experience of any of this. I became increasingly aware of a feeling of discrepancy, for lack of a better word. For a very long time, I had been perfectly happy with just being a video voyeur. But now I began to seriously consider trying out spanking and CP for myself, if only to get an insight into how it felt like for the spankees in the videos I so enjoyed. But how to go about it? I did not know anybody in the BDSM scene. Online, I had chatted with a couple of fellow video collectors who were just as clueless about real kink as me. That was the full extent of my acquaintances.

In the next instalment, I will tell you how I progressed from gray theory to the green of life's golden tree (to abuse Goethe's phrase). In the meatime, if you like, you can share your own story in the comments section. Did you also wonder if you were perhaps the only person in the world who was fascinated by corporal punishment? How did you find out that there were others? What was the first great, erotic CP scene you saw in a film? How did your kink develop while you were a young adult?