Kaelah's Corner (Jul 2019): Consensual Non-Consent in Space

As the long-time readers among you know, I am a huge trekkie and grew up with Star Trek – The Next Generation, a series that always put a smile on my face. Now, approximately 30 years later, the old familiar feeling of joy is back – every time I watch The Orville. For those of you who aren't as geeky as I am, The Orville is a series created by Seth MacFarlane who is a huge trekkie himself. Thus, The Orville is an homage to Star Trek, but with more realistic dialogue and its own very special kind of humour.

As always, we are a bit behind the schedule here in Germany, because the episodes are shown as synchronised versions on German television. So it was only a few weeks ago that I watched the second episode of season two, called "Primal Urges".

It's an episode which, among other things, discusses the topic of porn addiction. And since the plot is set in the 25th century, we are not talking about watching videos, but about living out erotic fantasies on a holodeck. Lieutenant Commander Bortus, the second officer aboard the USS Orville, and his mate Klyden are struggling with serious problems in their relationship, and Bortus finds mental escape in the fantasy world of the holodeck.

What I love about The Orville is that they often manage to combine serious topics and difficult ethical questions with humorous scenes, making both work side by side. Plus, while most of the time things turn out to be fine at the end, which I love, they don't always give simple answers to the problems described. And they don't mind going a bit further with what they show than Star Trek ever would.

So, the erotic holodeck-scenes in "Primal Urges" are quite graphic (at least for the average American taste, I suppose, and for a mainstream television series). And since most Moclans are male and live in male-male-relationships, all the scenes contain guys only. Plus, they include kink! MM kink! Which, as the more avid readers among you know, is exactly my cup of tea.

Now, the problem is, that kink often isn't depicted very positively on mainstream television. It's either shown as something dark and bad or it is ridiculed. A plot about porn addiction in a series that has become famous for its unique humour holds the risk of both. But, to my surprise and delight, I found that neither turned out to be true. Of course porn addiction is depicted as being destructive, and rightfully so. And of course, the erotic scenes can't be taken too seriously. But, as a kinky person, I didn't have the feeling that this special erotic preference is depicted as being dangerous, sick, not even more odd than other sexual variations.

The most BDSMy scene that is shown is a dungeon scenario, with Bortus as the prisoner and a holographic warden as his counterpart. Now, as you might know, I don't care all that much about non-consensual dark scenarios, but the way it is depicted I have to admit that I loved it. I am going to describe the scene for you (I've looked up the English original conversation):

The scene begins with Bortus entering the holodeck and starting the simulation. The room turns into a medivial prison cell (with torches and all that). There are shackles hanging from the walls, but Bortus doesn't make use of them, he just crouches down in front of the wall vis-à-vis the cell door. The door is unlocked from outside and a warden steps in, carrying a battle axe and a plate with food. Warden: "Your supper, prisoner." He throws the plate at Bortus' feet. Bortus looks up at him: "Please, Sir, may I have some water?" Warden: "Very well." He turns around, leaves and comes back with a wooden bucket filled with water. He takes some of it out with a scoop and holds the scoop close to Bortus. But when Bortus wants to take it, the warden suddenly pulls the scoop back, takes a mouthful of water himself and spits it at Bortus, laughing. Bortus: "I beg you to release me from this dungeon. I have done nothing wrong." Warden: "What is your name, prisoner?" Bortus: "Cheston, my name is Cheston." Warden: "How badly do you want to get out of this prison, Cheston?" Bortus: "Very badly. I am to be executed in the morning." Warden: "Perhaps we can make an arrangement." He starts taking off his suit of armour. But Bortus objects: "No, I can not. I am a virgin in that way." The warden starts turning around angrily: "Then you shall die in the morning, Cheston!" He starts to leave. Quickly Bortus stands up and cries out: "Wait!" The warden turns around again. Bortus: "If there is no other way, then I suppose I must do what you ask of me." He takes a step forward closer to the warden and adds: "And more." The warden puts down the bucket, takes off a belt of his armour and walks towards Bortus. Here the scenes ends and the rest is left to our imagination.

Is this scene and the dialogue clichéd? Oh yes, definitely! In my opinion it's a hilarious parody and can't be taken all too seriously. However, to me it seems like a parody not from someone who looks at kink from the outside. To me it feels like an homage created by someone who understands and appreciates the power dynamic many kinksters seek. And even though it can't be taken too seriously, I have to admit that I find the scene quite erotic in its own way. I also love the wording and intonation. I might be wrong, but isn't the language a bit like what some kinksters might use for traditional upper class school or historical scenarios?

What impressed me the most, though, is how well the topic of consensual non-consent is covered here, in a way that makes the scene attractive even for me. First of all, how more topping from the bottom can one have? It is Bortus' holodeck program we watch, and the warden is just a holodeck figure, doing what Bortus has programmed him to do. Secondly, it is Bortus who in a way initiates the whole scene by asking to be released and by finally agreeing to give the warden his reward for helping him. The greatest part of the dialogue, though, is the very end in my opinion. When Bortus not only agrees to do what the warden wants him to, but on his own initiative adds that he must do even more.

So, my conclusion: My currently most loved TV series showed an episode which contained kink. And instead of spoiling it, they managed to depict kink in a funny way and even push some of my buttons as a kinkster. Sometimes watching television can make for a wonderful close of the day!

Have You Got A Cane With You?

Ludwig and I usually don't watch much TV. But in the recent weeks I have zapped a bit through the channels in the evening when I was too tired after a busy day to do something more productive. Some days ago I came across an older German hospital TV series called Für alle Fälle Stefanie.

It's basically a feelgood show, not as dramatic as many of the American hospital TV series. Instead, you are watching doctors and nurses with good hearts who not only cure their patients physically, but also help to solve family quarrels, bring people together and so on. Just the right thing after a stressful day when one's head is already dull.

So I watched a bit and relaxed. There were several patients whose stories were told in the episode I watched, one of whom probably was (I didn't watch the beginning of the episode) a single father who put his life at risk because he refused to quit smoking even though his lungs were in bad shape. Every time he had the chance, he went outside to secretly smoke a cigarette.

One evening when his roommate seemed to be sleeping, he went out on the balcony in front of the room and lit another cigarette. His roommate, who had quit smoking a few years earlier, saw him, though, and pushed the button to call a nurse.

Now, we all know that the plot and dialogues in this kind of series aren't realistic, but I really didn't expect what happened then: First of all, it wasn't one of the nurses who came into the room, but the doctor who had already tried, unsuccessfully, to convince our unreasonable single father to quit smoking. The roommate pointed to the balcony and made a gesture to indicate that someone was smoking again. The doctor signaled him to remain quiet and tiptoed to the balcony.

Then came the really unexpected part as the following dialogue occurred between the doctor and his patient:

Doctor: "Mr Leiser, I will have to fetch a fire extinguisher!"

Patient (throwing away the cigarette and swallowing the smoke): "What a beautiful moon tonight."
Doctor: "You are very ill. If I ever catch you again..."

Patient: "Have you got a cane with you?"
Doctor: "... I'll have to report you and then you'll have to pay for the whole party. There will always be someone who snitches on you, okay?"

Now I was awake! Did I really get that right? Did the guy really ask the doctor out of nowhere whether he might cane him? There was no mistaking he meant, because he used the German word "Rohrstock" which is the kind of cane used for whipping someone. The words for a walking cane and the like are different.

Well, I checked the online media centre to make sure that my tired kinky mind hadn't played a trick on me. It turned out that I had heard correctly. Who would write such a strange dialogue, I wonder? A fellow kinkster? I mean, the episode was aired for the first time in 2003, not in the sixties! And would anyone really ask a doctor that kind of question, kinky or not? I suppose I wouldn't. Would you?

Anyhow, it was a funny discovery. The thing is, there are famous scenes with spanking references in several movies and series which most of us know. And there are the kind of series and films where I would suspect that a kinky reference might come up. But in this case it caught me flat-footed.

By the way, of course the father did quit smoking in the end after he had found out his son had started smoking, too. So, they both promised each other to never smoke a cigarette again. And they lived happily ever after...

What I would like to know: have you ever had a similar experience with an unexpected spanking reference? In which movie or series? And what was it about? I would love to hear your stories. Please leave a comment if you like!

Please, Please (Let Me be Your Slave)

Recently, I was invited to a party organised by vanilla friends of mine. It proved to be a wonderful evening (and night) with good food and nice conversation. Sometime around two or three o'clock in the morning, we ended up watching old music videos which we enjoyed in our youth.

Among them was one by the great German punk band "Die Ärzte" ("The Doctors"), called "Bitte, Bitte" ("Please, Please"). The song is about BDSM, but the video adds another context. It is a clip against prudery, oppressive regimes and censorship, and it is most certainly very kinky. I saw it many years ago and liked both the song and the video, but I had completely forgotten about it until I saw it again that night at the party.

As explained on Wikipedia the song was definitely meant pro BDSM and in one version a dominatrix who was obviously friends with the group explains the meaning of certain fetish and BDSM terms. Watching the video, though, it struck me as ironic that while the band used a lady with a whip to symbolize oppression and censorship, we in the kinky community today have to deal with the censorship of images and videos showing such ladies.

So I decided to share the video as a memory from my youth with you. Two more hints for those of you who don't understand the German language: The ministry the young man walks into is the "Ministerium für Zucht und Ordnung". The correct translation would probably be "ministry of law and order", but "Zucht" can also be translated as "discipline" or "chastity". The inscription of the stamp says "zensiert" which is of course "censored" which is also what the Z on the banners stands for.

Here is a rough translation of the lyrics:

I have a gift for you
I love you, the gift is me
Do not ask me, you know why, starting today I am your property
You're hurting me what more do I want?
I am your servant, thou the Lord
From today I belong to you alone

Please let me, please, please let me
Please, please let me - let me be your slave

Whatever you order, I'll do it
I kiss the top of your shoe
And if you give me the whip
I know that you love me, too
I'm beyond redemption, whip me, put me in chains
From today on I belong to you alone

Please, please let me, please, please let me...
Please, please let me - let me be your slave ...

Please, please let me, when you want, please, please let me, how you want it...

Let's hope that one day, censorship of speech, music and consensual kink will be history. I have to admit that I don't believe this will happen any time soon, though, if at all. As a matter of fact, when I read the news today I am sure that the song is still as relevant as it was at the time of its release 28 years ago.

Munchie Gets Caned

Kaelah and I are still very busy with non-kinky things and hard-pressed for time (even though Kaelah has already been working on the audio story we announced in her blogiversary post, using the phrases you submitted). So I'm just doing a quick "filler" post today, but I think it is pretty interesting filler. I was looking for a spanking clip from a mainstream movie on YouTube, and as it so often happens on that site, I found something else entirely. The clip is titled "Munchie Gets Caned":

This is probably the most unapologetically raunchy caning clip I have ever seen on mainstream TV (if you can call Rad Girls mainstream, more about that in the next paragraph). Munchie takes a good half dozen cane strokes on essentially her bare bottom, wearing only the skimpiest of underwear. Then she takes a couple more on her belly, feet, arms, et cetera, all amidst the frat girl howling and giggling of her friends. Ladies and gentlemen, this is all very, very obviously catering to a certain erotic fetish (as is the whole custom of "birthday spankings" in general), but of course, on American television, nobody talks about it being anything erotic or sexual. This being American television, they also bleep out all the swear words, which I think is rather amusing in a "facepalm" sort of way.

Anyway, since I don't watch any TV at all, whatsoever, I have to look up where this came from. Apparently, Rad Girls is basically a female version of MTV's Jackass, with three performers going by the names of "Munchie", " Ramona Ca$h" and "Darling Clementine" doing crude, self-injuring stunts and pranks. It figures that they obviously did not practice their caning skills very much before filming the clip - they are frequently missing her bottom and hitting the back of her legs, which is a big no-no here among us spankos. Rad Girls is broadcast by MavTV, a television channel owned by the Lucas Oil lubricants company (I swear I am not making this up!) and focusing on, in their own words, an "action-oriented family audience".

Sexy young women taking cane strokes on their bare bottoms as family entertainment? I must say, I haven't heard that one before. 

Truth be told, I am not a fan of formats like Jackass. I find it all rather boorish and proletarian, not refined enough for the tastes of a European elitist snob like me. But I thought that this particular clip was rather entertaining on a voyeuristic level - not erotic, but entertaining -, and maybe you will too.

Hornblower

(Picture found at IMDB.)

For those of you who have been reading this blog for a little while, it isn't something new to hear that one of my favourite kinky fantasies involves M/M naval whippings and canings, especially when someone is made to kiss the gunner's daughter. Obviously, I have already managed to infect others, as this post by Bogey from Our Bottoms Burn proves.

Our reader and friend Fenris kindly pointed out a fascinating film scene to me which features a harsh punishment of a young midshipman named Mr Wellard. It's from the 2001 episode "Hornblower: Mutiny" of the TV series Hornblower. As Wikipedia explains, the series is "based on C. S. Forester's novels about the fictional character Horatio Hornblower, a Royal Naval officer during the French Revolutionary Wars and the Napoleonic Wars."

On the IMDB the plot of the episode is summarized as follows: "Sir Edward Pellew visits Horatio Hornblower who is jail in Jamaica awaiting his trial on a charge of making a mutiny. His problems began six months earlier when he was appointed Third Lieutenant aboard the HMS Renown under the famous Captain James Sawyer. It soon becomes apparent to several of the officers, including Horatio's friend Archie Kennedy who is aboard ship as Fourth Lieutenant that the Captain is suffering from madness of some sort. He is cruel and sees conspiracies everywhere. Both Horatio and Midshipman Wellard prove to be the particular objects of his wrath. [...]"

In a comment on YouTube the reason for the caning was explained like this: Mr Wellard “went against the captain's orders when the sail tore - like he was taught to do and should have done. He did nothing wrong, but the captain has become extremely paranoid and sees everything as mutiny.” Here is the caning, or, actually, the canings (I am not really sure what actually started the second round) that is / are carried out as a result:


As with all kinds of spankings, it is of course the kinky fantasy version that I find appealing, not the real historical one. So I am very glad to know that this is just a film scene and no real harm was done. But even in that light, the caning is still a bit too harsh for me and that even though I am into rather severe canings.

There are several aspects of the scene which I find very appealing, though. Of course there is the formal, ritualistic style of the whole procedure. In addition, Mr Wellard, the handsome young midshipman (he is cute, is he not?) who is caned in the scene, is not portrayed as a deserving offender but rather as a victim of the captain's paranoia. This allows for a high degree of sympathy with him during his ordeal. Therefore, his fellow sailors of all ranks (except for one guy) obviously have a lot of sympathy for the young midshipman as well and visibly suffer with him, counting the strokes and wishing for the punishment to be over as quickly as possible. On the other hand, Mr Wellard is not portrayed as being weak and completely helpless. He calmly surrenders to the punishment without any resistance, making sure to at least keep his pride. I do not only like Mr Wellard's bravery, I also enjoy his very restraint reactions which nevertheless reveal the great distress he is in.

In all these regards, the scene is right up my alley, even though it is much too severe, as I already mentioned before. I was also looking for another, less brutal naval caning film scene for quite some time which I had seen many years ago and which Fenris has finally found as well. I will share that one with you one day, too. And I definitely have to find Ludwig and me some authentic naval uniforms!

Kinky Fantasies: Sheldon Cooper and Amy Farrah Fowler

 (Sheldon Cooper. Picture courtesy of Wikipedia.)

After the first kinky fantasies episode featuring Leroy Jethro Gibbs, I wanted to write the next instalment of this series for quite a while. A special event which has already been discussed on the Spanking Blog (many thanks for having been the first to make me aware of this!) and by Ana, Pandora and Erica finally motivated me for this post and also answered my question whom I should feature next. Obviously, there has been a spanking on The Big Bang Theory, one of my favourite TV series, and between two of the best characters involved. Since I am a trekkie, a Wil Wheaton fan (who makes recurring appearances at The Big Bang Theory) and a total geek, I guess I don't have to explain to you, why The Big Bang Theory appeals to me so much. Heck, I even have some friends who don't dare watch the series – because for them it simply is too real!

The series and the characters in a few sentences:

In case you have been living under a rock, here is a short introduction to the series. The Big Bang Theory is centered around four male geeky (or, except for Leonard, rather nerdy) scientists and their friends. Apart from being very proud of their respective works, the main characters are science-fiction (lots of Star Trek in this series!), fantasy, video game and comic fans. Sheldon Cooper (portrayed by Jim Parsons) is a theoretical physicist with an IQ of 187 and two doctor's degrees. But he lacks any understanding for social graces and irony. Amy Farrah Fowler (portrayed by Mayim Bialik), who becomes his girlfriend despite of Sheldon's disinterest for physical closeness and love, has a Ph.D. in neurobiology and loves social experiments. She enjoys social interaction more than Sheldon and also develops a desire for physical closeness with him. But she also shares many of Sheldon's character traits and therefore is a great match.

Kinky label:

For me, Sheldon and Amy are a perfect example for an equal couple. Actually, it seems that Amy often is the one who is more active and takes control in their relationship in practise. You can see that in the following little excerpt which in my opinion exemplifies Amy's and Sheldon's respective behaviours and their relationship. But since Sheldon sets up a 31-page "Relationship Agreement" which Amy has to sign, I think one can say that he brings in his view as well. In my opinion, the two of them are predestined to be switches kink-wise.


Kinky references:

Until now, the most kinky reference between Amy and Sheldon was the two playing doctor with Amy wearing a Star Trek uniform which took place in the aftermath of Amy's above shown experiment. To me, this already has almost the same appeal as a spanking. But now, there has been a real spanking scene featuring Amy on the receiving and Sheldon on the administering end. You can decide for yourself, though, who is in control here.

Kinky appeal:

For me, Amy and Sheldon have a high kinky appeal as a couple because they are both strong and intelligent individuals and they share a relationship as equals. Their nerdy side makes them all the more attractive. I have to admit that Sheldon sometimes also awakens my motherly instincts, especially when he is ill and falls back into innocent child-like behaviour.

My favourite scenario:

Actually, I could imagine Amy as well as Sheldon on both the receiving and the administering end of a light-hearted, affectionate spanking. The spanking scene as it was shown on the newest episode is one of the few spanking scenes in the mainstream media which really touched me in a positive sense and made me grin from ear to ear. I love the consensual background. I love the affection. I love that there is no "strong man teaches errant young lady a lesson" pathos, even though it is formally a discipline spanking because Amy pretended to be still sick and therefore in need of pampering when she wasn't (I don't see it as a real discipline spanking, anyway, which is most probably one reason why I enjoy it so much in the context of being between a couple). I love the fact that Amy is so obviously enjoying the spanking and probably seeing it as a wonderful social (and erotic) experiment. And I love the fact that Sheldon tries to be strict but doesn't like disciplining Amy, and that he has no real clue what is going on erotically. Well, enough said. Here is the excerpt for you to watch:


Lessons learned:

The combination of kink and geekdom is darn sexy. But then, this insight isn't new, is it?

Kinky Fantasies: Leroy Jethro Gibbs

(Picture courtesy of Wikipedia.)

This is the first instalment of a series which I have planned to do for quite some time. It's about my favourite fictional TV characters and the kinky fantasies they create in my head. Having spent most of the time either in bed or in front of the TV during the last days due to a &$§#*%! cold, now seems like a good time to finally start this new blog feature. Pandora recently wrote a post about the TV show Castle and its cool and sexually submissive protagonist Rick Castle. The discussion in the comment section suddenly somehow also involved NCIS and its kinky potential. Since I am a huge fan of NCIS, I decided to make Leroy Jethro Gibbs the first fictional character I am going to write about.

The series and the character in a few sentences:

Gibbs (portrayed by actor Mark Harmon) and his team belong to the Naval Criminal Investigative Service. They investigate criminal offences involving members of either the Navy or the Marine Corps. Gibbs, a former Gunnery Sergeant and a very experienced Senior Special Agent in Charge, is the team leader. In short, lots of crime and suspense, lots of smart uniforms, a team consisting of very cool male and female characters and a very protective as well as assertive boss.

Kinky label:

For me, Leroy Jethro Gibbs definitely is dominant territorial. Oops, I guess that's a label usually applied to dogs rather than humans. But I think it fits quite well. In other words, Gibbs is a top who fosters and challenges his team members and who defends his pack against all attacks from the outside.

Kinky references:

The kinky appeal of NCIS is definitely high. In fact, I don't have to make up any kinky fantasies of my own because there is a lot of spanking taking place in the series, anyway. Or, to be more precise, slaps on the back of the head. As I stated in an earlier post, I am not very much into face slapping because it feels too real for me. But Gibbs wonderfully explains the difference between head slapping and face slapping and why he would never consider doing the latter: "A slap to the face would be humiliating. Back of the head is a wake-up call."

Kinky appeal:

Gibbs' appeal is quite easy to explain, given my kinky preferences. He is a stern but caring boss who has made his way up the ladder through hard work. Having been in the role of a probie (and on the receiving end of head slaps) himself, he now passes his knowledge on to his own team. Okay, okay, I admit it, the eye-candy factor is there as well. There is no way to deny that.

The attitude behind the head slaps and the relationships between the characters involved are why I love the head slapping scenes. The slaps are not about guilt or having to earn forgiveness. Gibbs even forbids his agents to apologize for their mistakes. There isn't a strict gender agenda, either. The female as well as the male members of the team are subjected to Gibbs' special treatment. And he even smacks himself once, knowing that he is about to violate protocol. The slaps are indeed a simple wake-up call, a reminder of who is in charge and, in a way, also a sign of care and affection.

Obviously, I am not the only one who loves the head slappings. There are several compilations of NCIS head slapping scenes on YouTube. Here is one of them for you to watch:


The funny thing is that it all obviously started spontaneously and rather out of character. Michael Wheaterly, the actor who plays Tony DiNozzo, the agent who quite often finds himself on the receiving end of Gibbs' head slaps, and Mark Harmon described the origin of the head slappings as follows:


There is only one team member whom Gibbs never slaps – Forensic Specialist Abby Sciuto. In my opinion, Abby would make a great switch, though. And I am sure that there are lots of kinky guys (and girls) out there who are sad that Abby is only very rarely shown on either the administering or receiving end of any slaps, and never in combination with Gibbs. In one episode, he threatens to slap her, though. I leave it up to you to interpret this scene:


Of course the slaps aren't the only kinky appeal of the series. Have I already mentioned the smart uniforms which can frequently be seen? And the abundance of cool, geeky and strong male and female characters? And the interrogations? Nothing more to add here, I think.

My favourite scenario:

Even though I like the other team members just as much (Timothy McGee even is a favourite of mine), the head slapping scenes with Anthony DiNozzo on the receiving end are my favourite ones. His facial expressions are delicious and the surprised little sounds that he makes are music to my little inner sadist's ears. Do I dream of more explicit spanking scenes? To be honest: not really. It might be strange for some people, but these small references which don't interfere with the adult, respectful, formal but friendly relationships between the characters have much more sex appeal for me than more explicit scenes would. I actually find the head slapping scenes much sexier than many several minutes long, full nudity spankings shown in kinky videos. Not only because I often prefer formal scenarios but also because the familiarity with the characters and the relationships between the characters make a smack erotic and meaningful to me.

Lessons learned:

An American friend once wrote that she had been told only Republicans watched NCIS. In my opinion the above excerpts show that one doesn't have to be a Republican at all in order to like the series – being kinky is all that it takes to enjoy the show. Oh, and I am obviously a uniform fetishist. Who would have thought?

Fringe BDSM

Kaelah and I have been watching the first season of the science fiction / mystery TV series Fringe lately. I discovered the series a while ago myself and have now turned Kaelah on to it. As I expected, Kaelah with her analytical INTJ gaze is quicker at figuring things out than I was when I first watched Season 1. Even though she regularly squirms at the gory scenes.

When it comes to films and TV series, Kaelah is more of a series person while I am more of a film person. She likes the extensive development arcs of characters and their relationships that are only really possible over the long run of a series. I, on the other hand, have always been a cinephile admiring the works of the great directors. I rarely find myself liking the premise of a TV series enough to invest the substantial amount of time required to view the whole thing.

So, I have only ever watched a small handful of TV series in my life. Two of them are science fiction / mystery series: The X-Files and Fringe. Which, I suppose, demonstrates once again that our outlook in real life can differ utterly from our preferences in fiction. In real life, I hate conspiracy theories and pseudo-science. They and the half-educated cretins believing in them fill me with disgust. But I do love a good conspiracy theory / pseudo-science yarn in works of fiction!

Fringe, in my view, offers some of the best science fiction ever seen on television. It is also one of those series that initially require a bit of patience. The first half of the first season plays like a decent ripoff of The X-Files, well-crafted and entertaining, but nothing special to write home about yet. It is only after a dozen episodes that Fringe becomes absolutely mind-boggingly awesome. Personally, I like it even better than The X-Files. The X-Files was a great, pioneering series back in its day, but the backstory with its standard alien conspiracy fare was actually somewhat bland. The backstory of Fringe, on the other hand, is a brilliantly inventive mind twister. I don't want to spoil it for you, so I won't give any clues. Let's just say that, if you like science fiction and mystery, you really need to check out Fringe.

The main characters of the series are: Olivia Dunham, an FBI agent assigned to investigate the spread of unexplained phenomena. Walter Bishop, a former government scientist who spent 17 years in a mental institution after a lab accident in which his assistant was killed. And Peter Bishop, Walter's son, a college drop-out with an IQ of 190 and a chequered past. As you can imagine, the three of them make for an interesting ensemble. Walter, played by John Noble, is especially fun. He is the archetypical "mad scientist". After having spent nearly two decades in a mental institution, Walter suffers from partial memory loss (always a great plot device) and has acquired various quirks, such as obsessions with certain foods and irreverent commentary on sexual matters. Fringe fans make a hobby out of collecting Walter's quirky remarks, which they call "Walterisms".

Speaking of which, here is a kink reference from the series which, thankfully, justifies me writing about it here. When the Fringe team discovers ligature marks on the body of a woman who died under mysterious circumstances (exploding heads, yay!), Walter makes a quip about sexual bondage. Peter is not too happy about it, though. Well, knowing Peter, I don't think he has any objections to BDSM per se. But he is a bit prudish when it comes to his father's stories. That can be excused.

If you are Fringe fans like Kaelah and me (or just fans of us!), don't forget to also check out our Psychic Weapon 'C' clip with Pandora Blake and Thomas Cameron, which was inspired by the series. It's available on Pandora's site Dreams of Spanking. Behind-the-scenes reports by Kaelah and Pandora can be found here and here.

Kentucky Fried Flogging

I'm back from a week of Easter holidays and pleased to see that the text I wrote titled Monks and Roses was successfully posted during my absence. You see, some readers have speculated in the past that I have an automated posting machine (see the comments section here), or that I am, in fact, a machine myself (as Rachel once remarked on Niki Flynn's blog: "It is sometimes quite difficult to tell the difference between Ludwig and a computer."). But this was the first time ever that I didn't publish a post "live", while sitting at the PC. I simply put it in the queue before my departure, and by the time it went up on Saturday morning, I was already in the Eifel mountains, looking at ancient German castles.

It was great to spend a few days totally incommunicado, without emails or internet, but with a new and very special companion. In the meantime, the "future posts" queue allowed me to keep up with my blogging schedule. Maybe it will keep people from starting silly rumours about my whereabouts! Still, now that I'm home again, there is a lot to catch up on. In the comments to Part IV of the Hostel Trilogy: Communion, the debate continued about how moral or immoral it is to thrash Hungarian vanilla girls in a super-severe CP movie. It's a question I answered for myself a long time ago, otherwise I wouldn't have wielded the cane for Mood Pictures in the first place. But while the subject is old news in one way, it was a long and fairly interesting discussion, and you might find food for thought in what I and others had to say.

With the Mood shoot, the extended multi-part report about it and a few more journeys in recent weeks, I didn't always meet my posting quota. If I had unfailingly stuck to my every-four-days routine from new year's day onwards, the 31st post of 2009 would be coming on May 1st. Now, what I'm going to do is this: because the final part of my Budapest travelogue was twice the length of an average text, at over 3,500 words, I'm going to count it as two posts. Furthermore, starting today, I will switch to a temporary every-three-days schedule, and this will take me to post number 30 of the year on May 1st. Then, the cosmic spheres of my universe will be in harmony again.

What you can expect in the coming month-and-a-half: another behind-the-scenes report, about an SM-Circus shoot I did in late March with Pandora Blake. Followed by an account of my adventures with the "special companion" I mentioned before. Third, if everything goes as planned, I'll visit another CP video producer soon and I'll write about the experience (hint: it's one of the websites I reviewed last year). And in mid-May, it's time for the BoundCon VI fetish convention here in Munich, where I'll meet old and new friends. Looks like there will be some lengthy texts to write, plus the usual movie and paysite critiques.

While I'm getting on the job, I leave you for today with a humorous little clip from the big screen. It's from The Kentucky Fried Movie, the first collaboration by Zucker, Abrahams and Zucker (ZAZ), the team responsible for popular anarcho-slapstick classics like Airplane!, Top Secret! and The Naked Gun series. In my opinion, their earliest effort is also their best. KFM is just a collection of sketches, basically, spoofing everything from TV commercials to news programs to high school science films. It's a hit and miss affair, with some parts that are clearly better than others, but the hits are riotously funny - raunchy, irreverent and in wonderfully bad taste. The main feature, a longer segment called "A Fistful of Yen", still stands as the best Bruce Lee parody of all time.

My other favourite sketches include the trailers for the exploitation flicks of mythical producer "Samuel L. Bronkowitz" (a pun on Samuel Bronston and Joseph L. Mankiewicz). They lampoon 1970's disaster movies ("That's Armageddon!"), blaxploitation cinema ("Cleopatra Schwartz") and pornography ("Catholic High School Girls in Trouble"). The porn film spoof also includes a bit of whipping, the "crazed clown" at 1:23, which is why I'm posting it here. It's much too brief and silly, of course, to be of any erotic interest, but I thought it's fairly entertaining in its way.

As a porn trivia footnote: the big-breasted woman in the shower is Uschi Digard, a Swedish-born softcore model who was quite famous at the time. She has a whipping scene of her own in a (rightfully) forgotten 1973 sexploitation movie named Superchick.

Scream Queen '69

While Mood Pictures finish the post-production on part one of our women in prison "documentary" and I write the final part of my behind-the-scenes report, here is a nice little whipping clip from the big screen to keep you entertained. Fittingly enough, it is about... women in prison!



Actually, "big screen" might be a bit of an exaggeration - the scene is from an obscure old exploitation flick from 1969, titled The Detention Girls. Starring Dolly Abrams, Jennifer Early, Ann Welles and a bunch of other people I've never heard of. At the time of this writing, it still has less than 5 votes on IMDB, so it doesn't even have a user rating (probably all for the better). But whatever one's opinion on the cinematic merits of the film might be, you can't deny that the poster is frigging awesome:

"Erotic LOVE! Illicit SEX! The sizzling story of sadism, perversion and degradation in a woman's prison!" Ah, those were the days... They don't make 'em like this anymore. Today, only certain trashy tabloids use that kind of unhinged language and laughable CAPITALISATION (it's impossible to not read it louder than the rest, isn't it?). But unlike Mr. Myler's sorry excuse for a newspaper, "The Detention Girls" actually delivers on its promise: the illicit perverted content is quite good. Especially the bullwhipping scene. Of all the CP scenes from the "big screen", it has to be among my favourites.

The movie is about a pretty American college student who is arrested for taking part in a campus demonstration. At the detention center, she encounters - what else! - lesbian guards, lesbian inmates and lots of abuse from both. Her troubles reach their climax when another inmate splashes water on a guard and blames it on our heroine (hmm, splashing a guard, that reminds me of a scene I recently filmed...). She is taken to the basement and savagely whipped.

While the picture quality isn't great (it was a cheap black and white production), the scene stands out for several reasons. First off, the action lasts a solid three minutes, pleasantly long for a simulated CP scene. Secondly, it is well filmed, with a nice variety of shots. Most importantly, the victim is very convincing. She is rather forgettable as an actress during the rest of the film, but here, her grimaces and blood-curdling screams constitute some of the best "fake whipping acting" I've ever seen. Quite a talent in that department. If I had to give out an annual Scream Queen Award for scenes like this, this girl would get the 1969 trophy.

One more thought before I leave you for today: considering the British government's recent fondness for police state laws, I wonder if we will see real cases like this in the UK in the near future? I'm almost convinced that we will, you just wait and see. One day, some poor lunatic is going to climb atop the Tower of London and masturbate in public for all the city to see, and because he bought a DVD with "The Blowjob Adventures of Dr. Fellatio" six years before, they are going to blame it on porn. So they're going to outlaw all porn, they will bring back corporal punishment at the same time, and public protest against any of the new laws will be banned under the penalty of getting thrashed. Which will finally drive the kinky people of Britannia to the streets by the thousands...

A Birching for the Nine Days' Queen

When you ask kinky people about their favourite CP scenes from the movies, Lady Jane is mentioned frequently. It's a serious, somewhat staid British costume drama released in 1986 and largely forgotten by the mainstream audience today. But spankophiles still remember it fondly because of That Birching Scene featuring a young Helena Bonham Carter in one of her first roles (she was 18 at the time of filming).

Most of you have undoubtedly seen it already, so the attached video clip won't be new to you. Even so, I wanted to pay homage to "Lady Jane" on the blog sometime. It's a great little scene in a good and arguably underrated film. I recall renting it on VHS some ten years ago, around the time when I got my first internet connection. "Lady Jane" was among the first titles I specifically sought out after hearing about them on one of those useful "spanking in the movies" lists. My local video store only had the German-dubbed version and it wasn't until later that I saw the English original. But the birching scene was exciting nonetheless and didn't disappoint...

The movie chronicles the short life of Lady Jane Grey, who was the nominal Queen of England for nine days in 1553. It was a time of fierce struggle between Protestants and Catholics. Young King Edward VI was dying (probably of tuberculosis) and his half-sister Mary, a staunch Catholic, was next in line for the throne. This threatened not only the English Reformation as a whole, but especially the King's advisors and officers - Protestants who enjoyed very powerful and financially lucrative positions. Lead by John Dudley, Duke of Northumberland, they persuaded Edward to change the succession, passing over the princesses Mary and Elizabeth in favour of his cousin Jane. The ill-conceived plot failed, however. Jane and her supporters were quickly overthrown and "Bloody Mary" won the day. She was imprisoned and eventually executed in 1554.

"Lady Jane" portrays the Nine Days' Queen as a tragic heroine, a youthful idealist and zealous reformer, and finally as a religious martyr who chooses death instead of renouncing her Protestant faith. The film also focuses a great deal on the romance with her arranged husband Guilford, the son of John Dudley. Sadly perhaps, this is the biggest historical inaccuracy - by all accounts, the real Jane and Guilford never got on well. In the movie, they start out with a deep disdain for each other and for their forced marriage, but they eventually fall in love. I actually liked the fictional love story. It's anachronistic and follows the typical "mismatched romance" film formula, contrasting a studious and bookish Jane with her fun-loving, but sensitive husband. But I admit to having a soft spot for that kind of thing. Kitschy love stories are one of my guilty pleasures. Especially when they involve corporal punishment.

Speaking of which, let's get to the birching scene. It takes place towards the beginning of the story, when Jane's parents inform her that she is to be married to Guilford Dudley. The headstrong young lady promptly refuses and has to be persuaded with a taste of the rod. This is apparently historically accurate. Jane had an unhappy relationship with her parents, who enforced a strict disciplinary regime, and there are sources which claim that she was literally beaten into consenting to the marriage. What sounds horrible today would have been viewed as acceptable at the time - Jane was a young noblewoman expected to obey her parents' will, if need be through the use of force.

The depiction in the movie is certainly not among the longest or most graphic CP scenes ever filmed. There is no nudity and we don't see any strokes landing, just facial reactions. Instead, the scene gets its intensity purely from the character interaction and the dramatic staging - the elaborate punishment ritual, the whipping bench, the male servants leaving the room, and so forth. I like the ominous first look at the birch, the slow and graceful movement as it comes into the camera's view. And Helena Bonham Carter feigns some fairly good reactions to the beating.

Moreover, I empathise with Lady Jane's character, her scholarly devotion, her love of learning. This aspect is accurate as well. While Jane Grey wasn't the progressive social reformer portrayed in the film, it is generally agreed on that she was one of the most learned women of her time, with a comprehensive education in Latin, Greek, Hebrew and contemporary languages. She was also of royal blood, not some peasant girl getting whacked for stealing bread. Jane's fine mind and noble status make her chastisement all the more interesting for me. While the scholar in me identifies with her and roots for her, my inner sadist delights in her ordeal.

The aftermath is great, too, with boy-king Henry dashing in to end his cousin's torment. Another totally fictional event, of course, but adding a nice touch of damsel in distress. An exquisite scene as he finds poor Jane in a tearful heap on the floor and comforts her. I found the story he tells her quite intriguing - how he as the king couldn't be subject to corporal punishment and how a servant was whipped in his place to pay for his transgressions. That kind of "sacrificial lamb" concept is right down my alley, I'm fascinated by the psychology of it.

In summary, I recommend that you go out and rent "Lady Jane". Not only does it contain one of the all-time great CP scenes from the movies, it is a pretty decent film from start to finish. Some viewers might find it a bit overlong and talky, but history buffs like me will love it. Helena Bonham Carter gives a magnificent performance in the title role and has good on-screen chemistry with Cary Elwes, who plays Guilford Dudley. The supporting cast features several actors from The Royal Shakespeare Company, including John Wood as the Duke of Northumberland and an already bald Patrick Stewart as Jane's father.

The Kink of Cthulhu

Did you ever notice that there is an above average percentage of geeks among us spanking bloggers and readers? I don't know why, exactly. Sure, we're on the internet and have largely the same demographics as all the other virtual communities. But I think that this is only part of the explanation. Beyond that, there seems to be an unusually strong correlation between kink and geekdom. Probably something to do with the fact that both types of people tend to have a fertile imagination and fantasize a lot. Maybe I'll write a lengthy study on it someday.

In the meantime, here is a "whipping scenes in movies" post geeks should love because it comes from the twisted, sanity-shattering world of Lovecraft horror: the 1986 B-movie splatterfest From Beyond. Be forewarned, the "kinky" scenes themselves are extremely lame, but the movie is interesting for a number of reasons. To begin with, it comes from the same team that created the outrageous horror-comedy classic Re-Animator: director Stuart Gordon, producer Brian Yuzna, screenwriter Dennis Paoli. Like its predecessor, "From Beyond" stars Jeffrey Combs and Barbara Crampton, was released by genre studio Empire Pictures and is loosely based on a short story by H.P. Lovecraft. The two films can be watched as companion pieces, actually.

The plot bears little resemblance to the literary original: physics student Crawford Tillinghast (Combs) and his mentor Dr. Pretorius are experimenting with a so-called resonator, a machine that stimulates the pineal gland. Pretorius believes that the gland is a dormant sensory organ which would enable humanity to see beyond the borders of accepted reality. He succeeds, but the downside is that his resonator opens the door to a parallel universe inhabited by hostile alien creatures. One of them promptly bites off the doctor's head.

Tillinghast manages to escape, but is arrested as a murder suspect and locked in an insane asylum - obviously, the police dismiss his claims about unseen mysterious beings. However, psychiatrist Dr. McMichaels (Crampton) discovers that Tillinghast actually has an enlarged pineal gland and begins to believe his story. Together with the highly reluctant physicist and a policeman (Ken Foree of Dawn of the Dead fame), she travels to the Pretorius house to repeat the experiment and find out if her patient is crazy or not. As you can imagine, things go very wrong from there...

"From Beyond" isn't as over-the-top as "Re-Animator" and doesn't have the same relentless pace or dark comedic brilliance. But it's still a solid effort and recommendable for genre fans - campy, gory, with good effects considering the budget and decent performances from the leads. It's always great to see the one and only Jeffrey Combs cast as a nerdy scientist. Moreover, the movie has a lot of nostalgic value for me. As a teenager, I saw a heavily cut version on German TV and it was my first (albeit distorted) introduction to Lovecraft. I also developed an intense geek-boy crush on scream queen Crampton. Years later, I was in love with this blonde, glasses-wearing girl at university and I wanted to write something favourable about her in my diary. So I noted that she "looks a bit like Barbara Crampton in From Beyond", which was one of the most awesome compliments I could think of.

One notable difference to the original is that director Stuart Gordon adds a fair share of sex, as he usually does. This is of course totally against the spirit of Lovecraft, the puritan from New England who regarded pleasures of the flesh as bestial and primitive. But it works well as an exercise in deliberately bad taste. "Re-Animator" had the immortal, infamous oral sex scene with a severed head. Here, Crampton is once again viciously molested by the (literally) slimy monstrous villain. (Too much tits for YouTube, hence not in my clip - but I have to leave some of the good stuff out to make you want to rent the film)

"From Beyond" contains two elements of note: first, the machine that stimulates the pineal gland also increases people's sex drive. Which is a juicy concept in itself, something you would expect in a David Cronenberg film. Secondly, and this is where it gets interesting for us kinky types: mad evil scientist Dr. Pretorius is portrayed as having a taste for BDSM (see the clip). It's all very campy and cliché-ridden. According to his assistant, the doctor's whipping sessions were non-consensual (see clip at 1:09). It is later implied that he was impotent and couldn't get aroused from "normal" sex. Before long, Barbara Crampton finds herself under the influence of the resonator and dons some garden variety dominatrix gear in a lengthy but boring scene (clip at 2:37).

But I don't really mind the laughable stereotypes. We spankos always point out, rightfully, that our play and our fiction should be taken as pure fantasy, not as real abuse. I feel that, when it comes to the depiction of kink in schlocky horror films, we should listen to our own advice and not take everything we see at face value. It's obvious that Stuart Gordon doesn't have anything against BDSM and isn't making a serious statement of any kind. He just uses the "perversion" of whips and bondage for tongue-in-cheek shock value, to add a bit of flavour to the villain. I'm absolutely fine with that.

My only complaint is that he doesn't do enough with the idea. It never transcends the level of camp and doesn't even succeed there - the results are lame and not nearly as hilarious as the naughty bits in "Re-Animator". It's a pity - I think the notion of the mad kinky scientist had real potential. A man (or woman) for whom the five senses aren't nearly enough, who wants to experience more than any human being has ever experienced. And who gets obsessed by his pursuits to the point of insanity. If that doesn't sound like your typical CP fetishist, then I don't know what does - the two passions would seem to make a perfect match!

Then there's the resonator, a machine that can turn vanilla people kinky - at least it worked in the case of sexy Dr. McMichaels. Wouldn't that be a neat gadget to have? Off the bat, I could think of any number of people I'd like to use it on. I'm sure you could, too. Let's roll it into parliament when they debate their latest police state law against "violent porn". Or I could invite some of my female vanilla friends, just for fun. The ones in the "potentially interesting, too bad they aren't fellow perverts" category. Ah, the joyful possibilities...

So while "From Beyond" gets mediocre grades for execution, and while the whipping scene (if you can call it that) doesn't amount to much, there is some food for thought here.

Spanked Women on the Moon

I'm really proud of what I'm about to unleash on you today. It's cheesy alright, but only a True Geek like me could have found the following scene. It's from the 1953 science fiction B-movie Project Moon Base. The film has an IMDB rating of 2.1 at the time of this writing and was parodied by Mystery Science Theater 3000. You get the picture.

Basically, it's a poor man's version of Destination Moon, and this is actually how I located it. I had just watched the George Pal classic, I was browsing the excellent SF, Horror and Fantasy Film Review site, and before long, I had discovered that there was another moon mission film based on the work of Robert A. Heinlein: "Project Moon Base", a much lesser effort and rightfully forgotten. But, there was talk about a spanking scene!

It's only a threatened spanking, but hilarious nonetheless. The whole film is hilarious in a "so bad it's almost good" way. Especially its attitude towards women, which is just horribly dated - a typical confused 1950s mixture of faux feminism and patriarchic condescension. One of the protagonists is a female astronaut officer, but what starts out as an attempt to portray gender equality in the military / space program soon collapses into embarassing sexism.

I mean, to begin with, the character is called Colonel Briteis! Get it? Bright eyes. And she is constantly patronized by her male colleagues. “Can I help you up? Can I strap you in?” (Yeah! Bondage!) Those were the post-WWII days with their double standards, when women were encouraged to seek higher education and professional training, but expected to then meekly step aside and let the men take charge.

Socially, "Project Moon Base" is very much a product of its time. And a dull sci-fi snoozer with wooden acting and cheap special effects. But I like the following scene. The "soundproof" line really had me in stitches. Ah, they don't make 'em like this anymore...



(In the unlikely case that you want to see the whole movie, the MST3K episode is available on Youtube, and there is a BOO! TV treatment on Google Video. See, I told you I was a True Geek. Actually, the soundtrack of my clip is a combination of these two versions, because I wanted to get it as clean as possible, without any outsiders blabbering. Can't believe I spent an hour editing sound files for this piece of celluloid crap...)

Marlene on the Wall

My apologies for the lack of updates in the past ten days, but I had some computer troubles that severely restricted my internet access. It seems to be a common problem for some of us kinky bloggers in recent weeks. But now I'm back on the air, as you could say, and I'll make up for my absence with an increased frequency of posts, to reach my planned June quota. Can't let my beautifully laid out long-term plans be ruined by worldly issues!

So, without further ado, here's something about an interesting mainstream movie. Well, two movies, actually, and neither of them totally mainstream, but see for yourselves...

Bernardo Bertolucci's Last Tango in Paris is on everyone's list of influential erotic cinema masterpieces. Released in 1972, it was groundbreaking and of course highly controversial, paving the way for other films that brought sex and sexual obsession out of the porn ghetto and into the realm of "respectable art". Watching the movie today, one wonders what all the fuss was about. The "explicit" scenes have since been overshadowed by newer, more outrageous breaches of taboo. But more significantly, "Last Tango in Paris" remains a powerful film in its own right and a captivating love story that is at the same time sobering and strangely sweet.

It's interesting to note that, 35 years later, society hasn't made any real progress when it comes to accepting the exploration of sex in art or in the media. Sure, you can show a lot of things that you couldn't have put out there a generation ago. For one thing, music videos, TV series and advertising spots are crammed with tits. Huge, threatening tits! But that's not sex, it's titillation - neat, controlled and commercialized. When it comes to films that openly deal with sex between actual human beings, or even worse, with unusual sexual practices and relationships, we still get the same silly protests and debates. Secretary and Brokeback Mountain come to mind as recent examples, and The Dreamers, another film by Bertolucci.

Coming 30 years after "Last Tango in Paris", "The Dreamers" makes for an interesting companion piece. Both stories are set in the same city and chronicle the sexual (and other) obsessions of characters who try to shut out the world outside, to live only by their own rules. Each time, they fail as reality catches up with them.

The protagonist of "The Dreamers" is Matthew, a young American exchange student who comes to Paris during the turbulent spring of 1968. A shy loner who spends most of his time at the cinema, he becomes friends with Isabelle and her brother Theo, two French students who share his love of the movies. When their parents leave for a month, they invite Matthew to stay at their apartment. He learns of the intimate relationship between the siblings and is pulled into their world. The three seclude themselves from the events outside, and before long, their lives only consist of classic films, sex and conflicting emotions.

Together, the two movies provide an apt illustration of the sexual revolution and how we look back on it today. Where "Last Tango in Paris" was raw and radical, "The Dreamers" is tinted with poignant nostalgia. Overall, the latter work is lighter, more playful. But while "The Dreamers" is not a groundbreaking or important film, it is well worth seeing. I liked it a lot.

There aren't any kinky scenes in it, really, not in the classical sense. But Isabelle and Theo have an interesting game of "Do you dare?" going on, constantly trying to outdo each other. Here is a clip of what the naughty French girl makes her brother do when he loses a movie quiz. I think it's very elegant how she gets two birds with one stone here, savouring the victory over Theo while also shocking (and exciting) her American friend.

How about a spanking movie set in Paris? Anyone up for that? It wouldn't even have to be filmed there, as the story I have in mind is about a bunch of characters totally retreating from the outside world, most of it taking place in a seedy apartment. We just insert some stock footage of the Eiffel tower, and a few lines of dialogue in French. C'est une bonne idee, non?

Long Live the New Flesh!

Last Saturday, I met Tom of Punished Butts and "terror bunny" Pinkie Pain. They were visiting Munich for a day and, happily, we found time for coffee and a chat. Be sure to take a look at their websites - both are wonderful kinky people and have a lot of fine imagery to offer. And they're film buffs, too, so naturally, that was one subject of our conversation. As usual, Stanley Kubrick and David Lynch came up, two directors everyone seems to like (everyone with a shred of good taste, that is).

One name I didn't mention on Saturday, but could have: David Cronenberg. I just watched some of his work again, and no matter how often I see it, I'm blown away. Certainly one of my favourite filmmakers and another guy I'd love to have coffee with. For me, Cronenberg is the undisputed "king of horror" of the past 30 years. Of course, he is much more than a genre director. His horror is not the easy, superficial scare of the slasher, but the intellectual kind, the dark, frightening abyss of the human mind. In one way or another, most of Cronenberg's films deal with sexuality, body modification, violence and control. How our primordial impulses are barely kept in check by the bounds of civilization. How mind and matter interact. How quickly the tenuous border between sanity and madness can be crossed (and how do we tell the difference, anyway?). How technology can change our perception of reality and, therefore, our reality itself.

In light of the subject matter, it goes without saying that kinky themes can be found here, there and everywhere in Cronenberg's movies: Shivers (1975) offers an interesting variation on the zombie film, where the residents of a high-rise apartment complex are infected by parasites that turn them into sex-crazed maniacs. Rabid (1977) features porn star Marilyn Chambers in a surprisingly well-acted performance as Rose, a girl who undergoes experimental plastic surgery and, as a result, develops a taste for human blood. After his divorce, Cronenberg made The Brood (1979), a film about murderous mutant children and a man strangling his institutionalized wife.

The Fly (1986) is a hilarious (and pleasantly disgusting) remake of the cheesy 1950's mad scientist movie (Cronenberg has a brief cameo as a gynecologist). In Dead Ringers (1988), Jeremy Irons plays identical twins who are both doctors (gynecologists, of course) and share everything in their lives, including women (easy when you look the same!) and insanity. Crash (1996) deals with car wrecks, the beauty of injury and lots of sex, in an artistically successful manner and to the outrage of moral guardians everywhere.

The list goes on and on... It's hard to pick a favourite, but if I had to, I would probably select Videodrome (1983). It stars James Woods as Max Renn, a "sleaze and violence" TV programmer who starts hallucinating and losing grip on his life after he discovers "Videodrome", an underground torture and murder broadcast. His girlfriend Niki... err, Nicki Brand (played by Deborah "Blondie" Harry) has a knack for masochism and goes off to audition for the show. But as if that wasn't good enough, one character I can really identify with is Professor Brian O'Blivion (sic!), a futurist scholar who only appears on screen because "the monologue is his preferred mode of discourse". He rambles on about TV as "the retina of the mind's eye" and how it will create new human organs in the brain. Wonderful stuff.

As for Max Renn, he realizes much too late that the makers of "Videodrome" are even more sinister than the "torture show" exterior would suggest. But by this point, he can't be sure what is real and what is video hallucination. The same insecurity applies to the viewer, and therein lies much of the appeal. In summary, we have a film that is delightfully ambiguous and paranoid, covers a philosophically interesting subject (perception, reality), has a healthy dose of dark humour, a moody brooding soundtrack and some very disturbing scary scenes. Required watching.

Those of you who still remain unconvinced that "Videodrome" is worth a rental can take a look at the following trailer. It contains some glimpses of the underground TV signal. According to a Cronenberg interview, one of the actresses got really into the whipping... And is it just me, or did Hostel copy the apron outfits of the torturers? Later on, there is an SM-themed scene with Max and his girlfriend, followed by one of his hallucinations. Flogging a TV set - if that's not kinky perverted stuff, then I don't know what is.

Psychic Girl Gets Spanked

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