Thursday, September 30, 2010

Kaelah's Corner (Sep 2010):
I Don't Need No Education

Recently I've read several posts written by various bloggers which made me think about how my kink works for me exactly and what I get out of it. I think by now I've got quite a clear picture not really about why I am kinky at all but about why my kinky fantasies are as they are. Some of the thoughts that came to my mind during my recent analysis were actually quite liberating. I will try to put them together on the blog and to sort and structure them. But I have to warn you: First of all, my remarks might still remain a bit inconsistent in places due to the complexity of the topic. Secondly this piece of writing is going to be so long that I have to split it into three parts which I'm going to post in time intervals of three or four days. And third, in case you had a rather positive picture of me so far, it might be shattered into pieces once you read all three posts. However, at least I warned you...

The first post I read titled Do you like spanking? Do *I* like spanking? was written by Zille. In essence it was about some of our fellow kinksters who not only say that they hate being spanked, but pretend to get absolutely nothing out of it whatsoever. I absolutely agree with Zille's advice for them: If you really hate it, then don't do it! Of course there are many bottoms who don't like the actual spanking itself (it hurts!), but in the end they are getting something out of it. That can for example be the empowering feeling of survival. Like Niki Flynn once put it in her book Dances with Werewolves: I don't actually like being caned; I like having been caned. Or maybe it's the feeling of relief after having cried, or forgiveness for those among us who are into real life punishment and domestic discipline. Zille aptly called this a love/hate relationship with spanking. I was never in any danger of denying the positive outcome I get from a spanking. But the topic of loving or hating being spanked led me to further thoughts about where I am standing in that continuum of love and hatred. And I found out that I usually prefer to have something I would like to call a love/love relationship with spanking. Or in other words: I can't enjoy having been spanked if I didn't enjoy the spanking itself!

Let me try to explain what I mean using one example where I'm drastically different from many others in our scene: My relationship to domestic discipline. Real life domestic discipline and punishments are very common among kinksters and kinky couples. And spankings for real life offences are the most obvious example for scenarios in which the bottom has a love/hate relationship with spanking. Bottoms who take the DD lifestyle seriously definitely don't enjoy the CP that goes along with it. On the contrary, the spanking is feared in this case. But still they get something out of it in the end. It might be the feeling of being cared for, the relief that comes with forgiveness or an improvement of their behaviour.

However, my relationship with Ludwig and our kinky play work very differently. I became aware of that when reading another two posts, one being written by Bogey from “Our Bottoms Burn” and one from Poppy. Bogey's post titled How We Do It is about the spanking play he and his wife Bacall enjoy. Bogey points out that the majority of spanking blogs he has discovered deal with one form of domestic discipline or another. He and Bacall however only play for fun and sexual pleasure. Bogey developed the theory that this is the reason why, unlike many other couples, the two of them can switch roles.

I had put up the same theory about Ludwig's and my relationship in a comment I had written on Poppy's post From Top To Bottom. Under this title Poppy explained why it is important for her that her partner Devlin doesn't switch. As she put it: I don’t understand switching. (Not the use of a switch which I think is just mean and horrid but rather the swapping from Top to bottom and back again.) I think switching is neither right nor wrong, but a way of doing and being that I find it hard to understand. I think that may be because for me being spanked and told off is a way I live, and I need to see the Top in my life as being in charge of me. We have an intense relationship. I don’t want to think of him being spanked because that would reduce my trust in him. Is that silly? I don’t think so because I want to look up to him all the time. I don’t think he is perfect and I know he makes mistakes, but I do not want him to be accountable like I am accountable. The thought of him being told off, let alone the physical aspect of it, makes me shudder and turns me off utterly. I do not know why that is but I feel it deeply. […] If my lover switched I would hate it for many reasons. I think I would feel too far below the bottom of the pile. I do not want to be a bottom’s bottom. I feel too emotional about it. I like the linear structure of the relationship. I like the faux traditionalism, the “father knows best” aspect of it. I like that he is stronger than I am and taller. I like that he always wins; that gives me tremendous comfort, and the idea of losing that makes me feel sad.

I realised that my relationship with Ludwig is very different and wrote: I’m a bottom and I started to explore my kink about 1 1/2 years ago. But from the beginning I assumed that there might be something else as well. A few weeks ago I made my first experience with topping (with my partner Ludwig on the receiving end) and for me it was a great experience. Now, first of all, Ludwig and I don’t live in any kind of DD relationship. I always wanted a partner who is eye-to-eye, I wasn’t looking for someone who would look after me, just someone who wanted mutual care. Luckily, Ludwig was looking for an equal partner, too. Of course he holds me tight when I’m sad and he cares for me, but I do the same for him and it doesn’t mean that I’m constantly looking up to him (I often look up to him because he has some abilities I don’t have, but I think it’s the same vice versa). What made me look up to him when we played for the first time, though, was the fact that, despite of being a top, Ludwig had made several experiences as a bottom in order to find out how a spanking feels like. I’m not talking about submissive experiences, I’m talking about severe spankings to see how it feels and to learn more about the bottom side. I’m very much into heroine scenarios and the fact that Ludwig had taken even harder spankings than the ones he dishes out made me feel like he was very experienced, safe to play with and that he had the “right” to dish out spankings like that because he knew what it meant. […]

Ludwig doesn’t switch very often and that is completely okay for me. But the fact that he had done it was very important for me when we started to play. As a matter of fact I think I would have a problem to submit to a spanking (at least a severe one) from someone who hasn’t experienced it him- or herself. Ludwig had lost a football bet long before we met and we decided that I should take part in the resulting clip with him as a bottom. So I flogged him together with Leia-Ann Woods. Ludwig had never done a scene with two tops and was interested to see how it feels like. It turned out to be a great experience for me! I obviously have a top side (I think especially concerning scenes in film clips), although I still believe that in our relationship I’m going to remain 95 per cent bottom. And I have even more respect for Ludwig now, because he showed the reactions I’m longing for in my “heroine” fantasies as well. He was very brave and took the spanking with a lot of dignity. That was wonderful to watch and made him a role model for me once again.

These two posts and the thought fodder they provided reminded me that I'm definitely not craving any kind of domestic discipline in my relationship with Ludwig. I'm an adult woman and I don't want my partner to hold me accountable for anything! As a matter of fact, I expect Ludwig to love me despite of any probable lapses on my behalf and without having to make up for them by facing any consequences. I don't believe in the effectiveness of spanking as an educational instrument, I totally disapprove of any kind of CP in the education of children and I don't think that an adult woman has to be educated by her partner at all. By saying this I don't want to hurt the feelings of those among you who are into real life DD. I'm just talking about my point of view about my own partnership here. Of course everyone can live the lifestyle that works for them and makes them happy! For me, however, the only way of dealing with situations in which one partner (usually unintentionally) hurt the other is talking it through, apologizing if appropriate and finding better ways of treating each other in the future. Because that's the adult way. And unintended mistakes do happen within a love relationship! If they don't, it either means that the partners match each other perfectly or have clairvoyant abilities or, and I think that's the most realistic explanation, they don't really care about each other any more and both live their own separate lives.

And concerning the things which I should or shouldn't do for my own sake? Well, of course, Ludwig tells me when he is of the opinion that I should or shouldn't do the one or other thing, for example for health reasons. I learn a lot from him and the different way in which he deals with certain things. But I'm an adult which means I can decide whether I want or don't want to follow Ludwig's advice. As Ludwig would tell you, I usually don't, but to my defence I would like to point out that he doesn't usually follow my advice, either! Of course that means that I'm fully responsible for my own behaviour and for taking care of my health, duties and so on, and that I can't rely on Ludwig for that purpose. Which is fine for me. It's the price of being an independent, self-reliant adult.

Why am I discussing that topic in such a great detail? Because when I wrote down my thoughts about domestic discipline it once again became clear to me how important my self-reliance on the one hand and being loved without having to prove anything on the other hand are for me. What's behind it is the fact that I am the one who usually sets herself under pressure well enough. I am the one who believed for a long time that I am valuable only as long as I don't make any mistakes and perform extraordinarily well. I am the one who is likely to feel guilty in case I can't meet my own high expectations or any expectations others might have. So, the last thing I need in my partnership and my spanking play is a second person who holds me accountable, scolds me for mistakes and makes me pay for them in order to earn forgiveness. Then the spanking would only add to my unhealthy behaviour and the resulting fears and negative experiences instead of helping me to overcome all that in order to be a happier and stronger adult.

As a matter of fact I need someone who shows me how to loosen up a bit, someone who reassures me that it is normal to make mistakes and that I should grow from them but don't have to feel guilty about them. So, I know that, given how I am wired, using my kink for disciplinary purposes and relief from guilt would be dangerous for me and my relationship with Ludwig. Not only would I hate the spanking itself, I would not even feel better afterwards. I want spankings to make me feel good, to be a positive experience. Not only in the end, but also in the process. I want my kink to provide me with a happy little universe that stands against the negative things and the fears I experience in real life. No surrounding outcome could be high enough to outweigh the negative feeling that letting me being spanked up to a point were I really hate it would generate. That's why I stick to Zille's advice concerning real life DD: If you hate it, don't do it!

Okay, so far we know that I crave a love/love relationship with spanking and that real life punishments don't work for me because they wouldn't give me the kind of empowerment for my adult life I'm obviously looking for. But which kind of play does work and how does it work? And what does that say about other aspects of my personality? Those are the questions I would like to look at in my next two posts.
[To be continued...]

Saturday, September 25, 2010

What to Wear to a Spanking Party?

Zille has written a very interesting post titled “What to Wear to a Spanking Party?”, triggered by two posts on vanilla blogs she discovered. Both bloggers obviously aren't kinky and they both have never been to a spanking party. Amber Matassa, the author of the first post, seems to have her information from a friend and from spanking related websites. At the end of her post she offers links to Our Bottoms Burn and Chastenwood. Her post is a short summary on some basic information about the dress code at spanking parties. To me it seems that her advices often don't take the variety that exists in our scene into consideration, but at least she doesn't make any dismissive comments about us kinksters. Unlike the second blogger, Kenny. The title of his post Spanking Parties and Their Odd Etiquettes sets the tone for his whole blog entry. Kenny obviously based his post completely on Amber Matassa's, his own accomplishment consists of skewing some of her statements and adding the one or other derogative comment about us “weirdos”.

The two posts animated Zille to write her own account of “What to Wear to a Spanking Party?” and to ask fellow spanko bloggers to do the same, because as she put it: If we do this, our posts will filter in with (and hopefully in a google search, over ) the other search results, so that people who are honestly looking for what they should wear to a spanking party will find answers from us spankos, not vanillas using our “shock value” cache for their own good. It’s like a “Take Back The Night!” walk, but basically, it’s just about taking charge of our own little piece of the internet. We can and should use the “naughtiness factor” of what we write about to our own advantage so we can help out the newbie spankos who are just coming out of the closet and need trustworthy resources and good advice. There is no reason in this day and age that first-time-spanking-party-goers should not be able to find all they need to know to give them the courage to get out the door!

I'm absolutely with Zille and I like the idea of having several posts written by different spanking bloggers about this topic. I think it would be great for newbie spankos to get some advice from people who are in the scene and have made their own experiences with kinky parties, instead of just being connected to the theme via their sister in law's Persian cat who is befriended with a dachshund belonging to a hairdresser who once talked to a customer about spanking parties... At first I thought I couldn't contribute to the topic, though, because so far I have only attended one private spanking party organized by Abel as a surprise for Haron's birthday. So, I definitely haven't got much experience myself! But then it came to me that it might be interesting for some of the newbies in the scene to read an account written by someone who is also rather new to the topic and therefore can relate to the fears and questions many first-time attendees probably have. So, here are some of my thoughts on the party dress code and other related questions which might arise when preparing for one's first spanking party. I came down to five points which I think might be worth to check before taking the plunge:

1. Is there an official theme and / or dress code?

I've never been to a public spanking party myself, but I just saw a post about the upcoming “Night of the Cane” written by Leia-Ann Woods. The organizers make things quite simple for the visitors by giving them a list of outfits which are permitted due to their dress code: Leather, rubber, PVC, academic, uniform, TV, evening dress. To me this sounds good because it gives new attendees a guideline for their outfits, but one still has quite a lot of options to choose from. You also find photos from their parties of the years before on their website which give you quite a good impression of how a fitting dress could look like. Some parties might of course have a single theme, like “Back to school”. Haron's birthday party had a school theme and so Ludwig and I had to get us some adequate outfits. That meant suit and tie for Ludwig and a school uniform for me.

2. Can I ask people who are more experienced?

If you are unsure of what to wear or whether the outfit you have chosen is okay, why not ask people who know the dress code of the party? Your sources could be either bloggers who have been to one of the parties before and make a post about the upcoming party or your friends in the scene or the host, in case you are planning to visit a private party. Since we usually don't have school uniforms in Germany, I was very unsure of what to wear at Haron's party. I knew that most of the other guests were experienced role players and I wanted to be properly dressed. Furthermore, I wanted my school uniform to be as authentic as possible. So we asked Abel how a convincing school girl dress looked like. He listed up the different possible items and I tried to get a better idea of the looks by searching warehouse catalogues offering school uniforms. Then I went shopping and tried to find clothes that looked as realistic as possible. When my outfit was complete, I sent a photo of me in school uniform to Abel and got his approval. So, when we finally went to the party, I didn't have to worry much about my outfit any more, which was good because I was nervous enough, anyway!

3. What kind of dress am I comfortable with?

To my mind it is very important to not only look at the dress code when attending especially one's first party, but to make sure one feels comfortable with the chosen outfit. Of course it is usually good to be rather a bit over- than underdressed because the latter makes most people feel insecure, whether it is at a business event, a vanilla gathering or a kinky party. In addition to that most people look more attractive in elegant clothes which can make things easier. Like Zille wrote: Get out the nicely fitted trousers and a nice shirt or sweater — even dust off the suit — most spankees I know would rather be bent over some pin-stripes than a pair of jeans! But, if you aren't the suit guy or the evening dress lady and the dress code allows jeans as well, it might still be better to stick with the clothes that don't make you feel like you're wearing a carnival costume. Because you haven't won anything, if the girls or guys say to one another after the party: “Have you seen that smart guy / girl in that attractive suit / dress? What a mess that he / she looked so uncomfortable and insecure. I would have loved to play with him / her, but I didn't dare asking...“ I think no one will deny you just because you are wearing a (clean and fitting) jeans, as long as you are happy, open and don't look too worried.

I wasn't really comfortable with the school uniform at first, because I would have preferred a more “adult” outfit thinking that it would make it easier for me to chat with people at eye level. But since the party had a school theme, I wanted my uniform at least to be as authentic as possible in order to feel more secure among all those experienced players. Later I found out that most of the other girls didn't try to make their outfit look as realistic as I did. Some were dressed much sexier than I was. But the authentic looks had been important to me and wearing it made me feel more comfortable. Being a bit insecure at your first party is of course absolutely okay! From what I've been told and have read, many spankos are rather shy and not the party animals. I definitely was insecure at Haron's party and everyone was very nice to me and had a lot of sympathy for the “new girl”.

4. Are there any other rules?

I'm sure that most of the parties have some rules visitors should obey, like which grade of nudity is allowed in the public play areas, how to behave towards other guests and so on. Even the Bound Con fair has such rules which are published on their website. I found a nice overview of spanking party etiquette on the Shadow Lane website, which also includes some encouraging advices for visitors. At Abel's and Haron's party there were some rules, too. For example all play was at the second floor, while the first floor was for eating and chatting only. Closed doors meant that some people wanted to play a private scene, open doors meant that one was allowed to watch. For me, the etiquette is maybe even more important than the dress code, because following it and being sure that others do so as well makes it less likely to get into unpleasant situations.

5. What are my expectations and limits?

Answering that question beforehand to my mind is the most crucial task to make your first visit to a spanking party a success. Do you just want to watch others play, since this is your first party? Or do you want to play right away? In public or in private? Which kinds of scenes are you looking for? And concerning clothing: Which level of nudity and touch are you comfortable with (especially as a bottom)? I think having answered these questions for yourself can make you feel much more secure when going to a kinky party for the first time because you have a clear picture of what you do and don't want. In addition to that it allows you to take a closer look at which kind of party might be the right one for your first experience. Of course you don't have to stick to your plans, if things turn out to be different than you expected or your gut feeling tells you that you are much more / less in play mood than you thought!

When Abel invited Ludwig and me to Haron's surprise party, it was clear to me that I wasn't comfortable with playing with anyone else than my mate. Ludwig was okay with the prospect of not playing with others, even though he had done that occasionally with friends when he was single. But I didn't know whether the other party guests might be offended by someone who attended the party but didn't engage into any play with others. We asked Abel about it and he told us that it was perfectly okay. Even more, he hinted the information to the other tops, so that I didn't have to explain my limits during the party. That definitely made me feel much more comfortable because I didn't have to worry about disappointing anyone.

After Ludwig and I had chatted with the other guests for a while at Haron's party, we went upstairs and tried out several of Abel's and Haron's implements. We did it in private, doors closed. But afterwards we passed an open door, leading to a room where Cath and Abel were playing a scene. Abel signalled us that it was okay to watch, so we stopped by the door and admired Cath taking a hand tawsing from Abel. When the scene was over, we stepped into the room. Ludwig had never administered a hand tawsing before and I had never been spanked on the hands, so we were both curious. Cath offered Ludwig to try the tawse on her hands and he gave her a few smacks. I wanted to try it, too, so Ludwig gave me a short hand tawsing while Abel and Cath were watching. I hadn't planned to get spanked in front of others, but at that moment I knew that it was okay. I don't think that I would have been comfortable with a bare bottom spanking while others were watching, but a hand tawsing was just right. So, I made my first experience with being spanked in front of other kinksters that day, while still being in my comfort zone.

For me, the approach of thinking, communicating and asking a lot beforehand, but being open for changes and new experiences during the party worked out very well. I can definitely say that my first spanking party was a good experience! The credit for that of course also goes to Ludwig, who accompanied me to the party and looked after me, as well as Abel, Haron and their affectionate and inviting guests. So, choosing the right party with the right people might be the most important factor of all. Which means of course that the more experienced party attendees in our scene can help to create many positive first-time party experiences for newbies by making them feel respected and welcome, instead of maybe only checking whether their outfit is 100 per cent perfect...

How about you? How was your first spanking party? Which good or bad experiences have you made at kinky parties? How important is the outfit and the dress code when attending a party? Are there any other important factors one should take into account? Or are you still planning to visit your first spanking party? Have you got any questions that could be answered by other readers? Feel free to share your thoughts in the comment section!

Friday, September 17, 2010

More Alarmism from the Spanking News

The Spanking News is a fairly interesting site for news about the video industry and other spanking-related items, which is why I have it on my link list. Their opinion pieces are another matter, though. A year ago, they came out with The State of the Spanking Film, a rather ill-conceived and alarmist piece. Essentially, a call for self-censorship among spanking video producers, because "there are some things we don’t want to see... depicted" and, God forbid, they might cause people to commit crimes. I wrote a rebuttal to it at the time. It seems the Spanking News has learned nothing since then, however, because they keep writing the same nonsense. Take this post from last month, aptly titled When is enough enough?. Personally, I have had enough already.

Time for another rebuttal, then. Someone has to do it and, if no one else is going to volunteer, it might as well be me (I take no personal pleasure from shooting down half-baked ramblings, I assure you):

"I have however spotted a growing trend out there and I have to say it is a not very nice side of the whole business. It seemed to start with the entry into the market of the Eastern European spanking businesses, let me say from the outset, there are some very good spanking web sites run by and from the East and they do have some very lovely young ladies who obviously enjoy what they are doing. No, I am thinking more about those who feature such headlines as ‘brutal whipping’ forced and flogged till she bleeds, Bullwhip and horsewhipped, beat my slut and more in the same vein."

It seems that the author objects to two things here: 1) the severity of the CP action in the videos, and 2) the advertising language used by the producers. These are two different issues, even though he conflates them somewhat.

Regarding the first point, severity, my own position has always been that as long as all participants are consenting adults and no permanent damage is inflicted, there is nothing morally objectionable about CP play, on video or in private. I think that is a sensible position to take, and also a fairly clear one. The author of the Spanking News, by comparison, never spells out a precise moral position. Throughout the article, one is often left guessing about where, exactly, the red line is for him. In any case, he never produces any evidence that the videos he criticises are produced in a non-consensual manner or that any permanent damage is done to the models.

Point two, advertising lingo. I am not a fan of "whipped sluts" sloganeering myself. I find it crude and unnecessary. At the same time, I would argue that we should not take it more seriously than it deserves. From looking at forums where CP videos are discussed, it seems clear that the majority of viewers do not take the slogans seriously themselves. They are quite able to tell the difference between in character and out of character, between advertising and reality.

That as it may be, it is certainly unfair to blame the existence of severe CP videos and crude advertising language on the Eastern Europeans. Producers like Nu-West/Leda (United States) have been making severe videos for decades, with canings and bullwhippings that draw blood. Spanking Online (UK) have a site called Slut Spanking in their network, and Paingate (Germany) frequently advertise with how "brutal" and "merciless" their videos are. So it seems to be more of an international phenomenon. Is it really a growing trend, though, as the Spanking News claims? I am not sure about that. Yes, a higher number of severe CP videos is being put out today than 20 years ago. But that is because the total number of videos being published has increased dramatically. For every producer like Mood Pictures or Lupus Pictures, you can find one like Northern Spanking or Firm Hand Spanking, who create much lighter stuff. I am not convinced that the actual percentage of severe videos is substantially higher than it was in the old days.

"Do we really want or need this? I hope that most of us would answer no but why are these web sites out there and why do they thrive? I am not a sociologist or a psychiatrist but I guess there are some pretty deep seated reasons behind the funding of the exploitation that goes on in this end of the market by the sad people who join these web sites."

Gosh, how it annoys me when these articles assume the first person plural and pretend to speak for "us" spankos. The supposedly normal and healthy majority, unlike the "sad people" who have a different taste in CP videos than the author. It is such a lazy debating tactic. "We" are not impressed by it.

The reason why these websites thrive is pretty simple: because, even though the author of the Spanking News does not like severe videos, there are apparently plenty of people who do. Moreover, as long as the videos are produced in a consensual manner and no permanent damage is inflicted on the spankees, there is nothing morally wrong with that. Assuming that these prerequisites are met, there is no moral difference between what Spanking Sarah does and what Lupus Pictures do.

Regarding the "deep seated reasons" for why people watch severe CP videos, I would be very careful about making generalising assumptions about that. Most of the empirical studies that have been done about kinky porn indicate that the viewers are a diverse group and that it is plainly naive to assume that they are all woman-haters or closet psychopaths. My own personal experience confirms this as well. I have received emails from dozens of fans of the Eastern European studios, for instance. While you do find the odd misogynist idiot among them, most of the people who write to me come across as thoughtful, well-adjusted individuals. They obviously care about the models and take reassurance from behind-the-scenes reports which confirm that the models are not being coerced. They were extremely concerned about accusations this spring claiming that Mood Pictures had abused a model during a shoot (an accusation which Mood deny).

"Exploitation, well what do you think, would the average girl, the girl next door to you, your wife or partner let herself be beaten till she bleeds, be whipped till she is obviously in such pain that any right minded person watching this stuff would be revolted, no this is plain and simple exploitation."

Wait a minute, chief. What exactly is exploitation? Some reasonable definitions I can think of for that term include: 1) directly forcing someone into a certain line of work, 2) employing people who are so poor that they literally have no other choice, 3) employing people without any care at all about their well-being, or 4) employing people without adequate payment for their efforts. But for all we know, none of this is the case here. The models are not blackmailed into the shoots, they are not starving girls from the street, the producers do care about their well-being (providing medical aftercare, for instance), and the payment for the videos is quite good. Yes, the fact that many models (in kinky and vanilla porn) are from the former East bloc does reflect differences in per capita income between these nations and the West. But that in itself is not, in my mind, enough to justify the sweeping term "exploitation". If hiring Eastern European women for porn is exploitative, then hiring them as cleaning ladies for far less money is even worse.

Moreover, cases do exist where people submit to severe beatings for other reasons than money. Niki Flynn and Adele Haze travelled to Prague to shoot with Lupus Pictures not because the werewolves pay well, but because they loved the movies. My girlfriend Kaelah and I filmed a hard 50 stroke caning last December, which is still to be published. Kaelah is not into beatings of that severity, but she wanted to do the scene partly as a favour to me and partly as a once-in-a-lifetime experience for herself. So, would your partner let herself be beaten until she bleeds? As a matter of fact, yes.

"Some of the beatings handed out to these girls are worse than those given for judicial reasons by backwards countries who have not even begun to embrace a civilised society."

Nonsense. While the beatings in these CP videos are certainly hard and painful, they do not cause any permanent scarring like a real Singapore-style caning. That is because the canes they use in places like Singapore are considerably longer, thicker and heavier. According to one source I found, they are 120 cm long and 1.3 cm in diameter. By comparison, the cane I used in my guest appearance at Mood Pictures (which I kept afterwards) was 80 cm long and 0.7 cm in diameter. Moreover, I did not swing it with quite the same martial arts-like ferocity which they use in real judicial punishments.

"Unfortunately these sites are outside anyone’s jurisdiction and so, like the sites run by the parasitical pirates they put themselves they are virtually untouchable, the only thing one can do is to avoid them, and those who advertise them."

More nonsense. Needless to say, these sites are not "outside anyone's jurisdiction". Has the author seen Hostel too many times? So have I, but I do not confuse fiction and reality. Eastern Europe is not a lawless void. Hungary, the Czech Republic and Slovakia, where some of the most popular producers of CP videos are located, have all been EU members since 2004. Things may be a bit wilder in Russia, but I believe that, even there, a producer who constantly abuses models would run into trouble sooner or later.

The police raid on Mood Pictures in January shows that authorities in these countries do, in fact, react when there are complaints. Whether the complaints in the Mood case were justified or not is another question. But it is obviously plain wrong to say that producers there are "virtually untouchable".

"As to the people who look at this sort of material, I can’t help thinking that they have pretty damaged minds, maybe they are not satisfied with just the usual spanking fun, it does not give them what they need so they look to this sort of dangerous imagery to satisfy them, the problem is, what will happen when even this does not satisfy?"

Remember how the author stated, earlier on, that he is not a sociologist or psychiatrist? Whenever someone writes that and follows it up with a "but..." clause, as was the case here, you have to be prepared for the worst. You can be sure that all kinds of unfounded claims and assumptions are about to follow. The non-psychiatrist from the Spanking News does not disappoint. Before long, he is merrily speculating about "damaged minds" and "dangerous imagery".

It has never been demonstrated that watching pornography, of any kind, causes people to commit violent actions. Usually, that claim is only floated by scaremongering anti-porn prudes, and it is extremely disappointing to see it repeated here. At least it helps to explain why the UK has some of the toughest laws against "violent porn" in the Western world: when even kinky people start believing the prudes' propaganda, there is not much hope for reason and common sense to prevail. Meanwhile, all the serious studies that exist on the matter indicate that the availability of pornography either has no effect on the sex crime rate at all, or that pornography may even help to reduce the sex crime rate.

All in all, another pitiful opinion piece from the Spanking News - shrill, hyperbolic, and based on unfounded assumptions rather than facts or personal experience. Hopefully, "enough is enough" already?

Sunday, September 12, 2010

The Final Mission

The vote for my blogiversary spanking is finally over and the readers have decided to send me on a painful mission. Well, I guess I asked for it. Or at least my Kingon half... 18 readers participated in the poll. Six of them, Andrea, New one, Gaviao, Rich, spickandspank and Saro, were first-time commenters, at least without using the "Anonymous" option. Thanks a lot for delurking and please feel very welcome to join the discussions about the different topics here on this blog! Of course some of the long-time commenters voted, too! Since the regulations prescribed additional strokes for every previous Kaelah's Corner post a voter had commented on, I can count myself lucky that some of the otherwise most-diligent commenters obviously missed the vote. Pandora, Peter and Ursus, however, did vote, which means 22 strokes go on their account! So, let's look at the final results!

1. Outfit:
There were five outfits the readers could choose: cowgirl, punk, secretary, Starfleet ensign and witch. The witch got no votes, although New one and Rich were in favour of her. But since other outfits already had higher numbers of votes, they decided that this outfit wouldn't have a chance to win and voted for the Starfleet ensign and the secretary instead. Hmm, why do a Starfleet ensign and a secretary seem to be the closest substitutes for a witch? However, the secretary and the Starfleet ensign were head to head for quite a while during the vote and when the poll should have closed (7th Sepember 9:35 pm German time), we had a tie vote situation. Ludwig came up with a very good solution for that dilemma: The poll remained open, but only the secretary and the Starfleet ensign could be chosen and the first voter for one of the two options would bring the final decision and close the poll. On the 8th September 12:59 am German time Saro voted for the Starfleet ensign and ended the vote via "golden goal". Obviously Ursus Lewis had his hands in this, using his power as a top to persuade Saro to vote for the outfit he preferred. Well, the regulations didn't prohibit that kind of manipulation advice, so I'm going to dress as a Starfleet ensign for the blogiversary spanking clip.

For the sake of completeness, here is the statistical overview of the votes for the different implements:
witch: 0 votes
cowgirl: 2 votes (Karl Friedrich Gauss, Prefectdt)
punk: 3 votes (Caroline, Andrea, Gaviao)
secretary: 6 votes (EmmaJane, Peter8862, Ernest, Rich, John, spickandspank)
Starfleet ensign: 7 votes (Morgrim, Pandora, Arjuna, Val, New one, Ursus Lewis, Saro)

2. Implements and strokes:
Participants of the vote could choose their favourite implement among the following five candidates: belt, flogger, paddle, riding crop and switch. Every vote added at least one stroke with the selected implement plus one additional stroke for every previous Kaelah's Corner post the voter had commented on. Some people obviously missed the cane among the implements. I had decided against the cane because I wanted to offer implements I hadn't used in a clip before. Except for the flogger this was true for all the implements I selected. And since I only got six strokes with that flogger for the football bet clip, I decided that it was okay to offer that implement, too, in case the readers wanted to see a "proper" (= longer) spanking with it. However, they obviously didn't. Instead, the belt and the switch, which I offered as a substitute for the cane, since the kind of pain and the marks are very similar, were equally popular among the voters. The final number of strokes with the belt I'll have to face is much higher than the number of strokes with the switch, though. That's because a certain someone, who is a very diligent long-time commenter, discovered the vote he had almost missed a short time before the poll was supposed to close and decided to choose the belt, adding eleven strokes to the score...

So, here comes the complete overview of the implements and strokes:
paddle: 2 strokes (spickandspank 1, Saro 1)
flogger: 3 strokes (Val 3)
riding crop: 9 strokes (Andrea 1, Prefectdt 2, Peter8862 6)
switch: 11 strokes (Pandora 5, Arjuna 2, Ernest 1, New one 1, Rich 1, John 1)
belt: 21 strokes (Karl Friedrich Gauss 1, Morgrim 3, Caroline 3, EmmaJane 2, Gaviao 1, Ursus Lewis 11)

My first idea was to round up all the results to the next multiple of six because, quite frankly ,these crude numbers are completely against my sense for mathematical aesthetics. And, in addition to that, getting just two or three strokes with some of the implements, but then 21 strokes with that evil belt on a merely warmed-up bottom seemed odd and I couldn't imagine how to produce a fluent spanking clip given those numbers. But Ludwig suggested to see it as a special challenge and to preserve the distinctive feature of this spanking by using exactly the numbers of strokes the readers had voted for. I have to admit that this is still very difficult for me for two reasons: First of all, I had already written down a first draft of a storyline for the clip, centred around the number six (12 previous Kaelah's Corner posts, five implements plus Ludwig as the sixth force, 18 votes...) which I have to dump now. Secondly, I'm worried that as the spankee I won't get into any kind of flow during the few strokes with the first implements and will have to get into the right headspace during the spanking with the belt. That could be especially difficult because we might have to use the belt even harder in order to present a proper spanking after the low numbers of strokes with the previous implements (I hope that administering only two or three strokes with an implement doesn't look too silly, anyway...). But I agree with Ludwig that this is the special challenge of my blogiversary spanking and that we shouldn't change the voting results of our dear readers, not even by adding strokes. So, I'll be facing 46 strokes in total – and we'll see how we can fit that into a good storyline featuring a Starfleet ensign.

In case you want a plot after all? When I came up with the idea for the blogiversary spanking, all I had in mind was a simple spanking without much storyline dressed up in an outfit chosen by the readers of this blog. But from the comments during the vote it seemed to me that it would be more interesting for the viewers to watch a spanking embedded into a scenario fitting to the outfit. So, I started thinking about plots for the different possible outfits which also included the vote in the one or other way. I've already got ideas for a storyline involving a Starfleet ensign. However, this would of course take more time to prepare, film and edit. The question is: Do you prefer a simple spanking or are you willing to wait a bit longer for a clip with a more elaborate scenario? Please let me know about your opinions in the comment section! Whichever option you prefer, the first possible chance Ludwig and I have for shooting the clip will be in three weeks. But you definitely don't have to wait that long to watch a spanking video featuring the two of us. Ludwig has almost finished editing and subtitling our first-ever clip (which is a hell lot of work!), so that one is going to be released soon. I'm looking forward to that day very much and to creating another little piece of film involving a Starfleet ensign and some very strange numbers... As we are fond of saying: A Klingon does not run away from his (or her) battles!