tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-616982860776135414.post5275804936050259677..comments2023-10-18T09:35:55.767+02:00Comments on LUDWIG'S ROHRSTOCK-PALAST: The Fantasy of Real LifeLudwighttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14975294529532823252noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-616982860776135414.post-10107667128343067322008-09-21T08:05:00.000+02:002008-09-21T08:05:00.000+02:00You raise some interesting questions, Karl. I'll l...You raise some interesting questions, Karl. I'll let them stand as such, because there probably isn't a definite answer to any of them, and if there is, I don't feel I can provide it.<BR/><BR/>The ambiguity of the relationship is indeed quite exciting. It's hard to put into words, because it's all so, well, ambiguous! I tried in my post.<BR/><BR/>Basically, Josephine and I are acting on two levels of reality / perception at the same time. And it's not simply a straightforward distinction like "in character" and "out of character". Things are much more complex than that. But I feel that this strange compartmentalization / overlapping / folding of reality or whatever pretentious term we want to apply is really at the heart of most kinky play. And it's what makes it all so fascinating.<BR/><BR/>I differ with you on one point: I wouldn't say that the "rulership", as you call it, is of special interest to me. Of course, I don't know what, exactly, you mean by "special interest". I have an interest in it, that's for sure, a (somewhat detached) curiosity. I'm always willing to try out things and experiment. But I'm not passionate about rulership and it's not an object of deep desire for me.<BR/><BR/>I'm really not the kind of top who craves control or authority. Sure, it's "fun" to be in charge in a game (and I regard that part of it as a game, at the end of the day, albeit an ambiguous one). But my obsession lies elsewhere.<BR/><BR/>My real obession lies with pain and sadism and willing sacrifice and extreme experiences and making that kind of journey, creating that kind of bond. I'll write about it someday in the followup to my "Severity!" post.<BR/><BR/>It has a lot to do with the *psychology* of pain, so it's not just about "thrashing someone hard" and the mere physical aspect. Again, things are a lot more complicated than that, I think. The psychology of sacrifice comes into it, and it doesn't even need to be about pain all the time, obviously. But if I had to describe myself in a single word, I'd probably describe myself as a sadist, first and foremost. It seems to fit best.<BR/><BR/>I also enjoy role-playing, exploring different characters and mindsets. That's another great passion, even though it came into the mix a bit later (after the basic curiosity of "how does it feel like to be spanked / to spank someone" had been satisfied).<BR/><BR/>So, anyway, when I first met Josephine (at a munch) and we got to talking about what attracts us to spanking, I never expected it to work between us. I liked her, she was a nice girl and pleasant to talk to, but she just seemed to have a totally different mindset and goal when it came to kinky play. She wanted punishment for "real offenses" rather than role-play. And she was looking for this super-stern authority figure, 24/7. So I thought: "Ah okay, that's not me, then." Because I didn't see myself like that at all, neither did I expect that it would be interesting to me.<BR/><BR/>But we started playing for the fun of it, and ironically, it turns out that I was pretty much exactly what she was looking for, had all those qualities (that's what she says, anyway). I still find it hard to believe and my self-perception remains largely unchanged (I'm not an authority figure!), but it seems to work for Josephine and that's fine.<BR/><BR/>As for me, I discovered that there are aspects of the whole rulership / control thing that I enjoy, which was interesting. I'd still say that my real obession is sadism, but Josephine is a very willing and brave victim for that, so it works for me, too.<BR/><BR/>On the whole, there are many reasons why a full-blown boyfriend / girlfriend relationship between us would never work. We're very different and have quite different interests, both within the kinky play and outside of it. For one thing, she's very much an outdoor girl and not the least bit geeky, so that's not the type for me, obviously!<BR/><BR/>But the kind of "professional" play relationship we have, the whole "motivational coach" thing works very well, is very exciting. It probably works so well because she is a friend, but not a close soulmate or a love interest.Ludwighttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14975294529532823252noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-616982860776135414.post-72490521193772714482008-09-02T23:59:00.000+02:002008-09-02T23:59:00.000+02:00Love the delicious ambiguity you guys are creating...Love the delicious ambiguity you guys are creating here. You've set up a disciplinary structure that's not based around an overtly sexual relationship between the two of you. <BR/><BR/>And on that level it serves the purpose of helping Josephine keep her nose to the grindstone of schoolwork in an effective manner. <BR/><BR/>And yet, on another level, you're both getting off on the frisson of Josephine's possible and eventual punishment for trespassing those same disciplinary boundaries. <BR/><BR/>The punishments are real punishments. And yet at the same time they're a creature of your mutual artifice, your agreements. The statement "she asked for it" was never more true. <BR/><BR/>And yet, no regular guy would play this game or treat her this way. No, it takes someone like you, Ludwig, for whom this kind of "rulership" is a subject of special interest.<BR/><BR/>And I must say, I'm with you all the way in not having unnecessarily micromanaged her life so far. And yet, as you say, perhaps a more interventionist approach would yield better "results", as in higher marks. <BR/><BR/>Such a fascinating case study. Perhaps someday you could do your PhD thesis on the results of a rigorous "study" of this sort. Wouldn't it be fun to interview applicants for the role of "test subject"? <BR/><BR/>Some would no doubt be disappointed when fate put them in the "control group" in which they would receive no disciplinary interventions. And how different that would be for them from not participating in a study at all. <BR/><BR/>For reasons like that, such a study could never be truly objective, but I'm sure a lot of fun could be had by many of those involved.<BR/><BR/>Now, having seen how the first term went, I think it's more ok to push her a little harder to take up your suggestions, now that you both recognize that hard work alone was clearly not enough to achieve the results she wanted. Of course, by insisting she follow your coaching directives, you're taking on more responisibility for her success or the lack thereof. Still, she sought you out for this role, so there's no moral dilemma.<BR/><BR/>I'm thinking that surely this cannot be a unique situation. I'm wondering what's the archetypal motif in this relationship? And where else do we see it echoed in the wider world?Karl Friedrich Gausshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01229774469243094801noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-616982860776135414.post-79103878098966206282008-09-02T07:12:00.000+02:002008-09-02T07:12:00.000+02:00If it help her...then it will be good. If she is ...If it help her...then it will be good. If she is in the mindset for it...she will go into subspace and learn the proper lessons from this.smithhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08149859459236260489noreply@blogger.com